Not Always You and Me
by AlwaysAndForever13
Summary: Bella has great friends and a great boyfriend. What could go wrong? The Cullens show up and everything changes. What happens when she is attracted to someone everyone loves to hate? ALL HUMAN. OOC.
1. I Don't Belong Here

A/N: Here is a sort of better summary:

Bella has lived with Charlie for two years now. Renee still leaves in Phoenix. Bella is starting her junior year of high school. She has great friends and a great boyfriend. She didn't think anything would change that that is until the Cullens moved to Forks. What happens when you are attracted to the one guy everyone loves to hate? What happens when you do anything you can to not let people know? ALL HUMAN. OOC.

I don't own anything…

* * *

_Beep, Beep_. Ugh. I rolled over in bed and picked up my alarm. 6:15 in the morning. No one should get up this earlier. I threw my alarm clock on the floor hoping it would stop beeping so I could get some sleep. See I couldn't sleep last night because today is my first day of my junior year. Sure I know this school like the back of my hand, but every year the same thing happens. Beginning of the school year jitters. Also it didn't help that it was pouring down rain…

I heard my door crack open. "Bells, time to get up. It's your first day of school! Don't want to be late. I'm leaving so you better get up!" Charlie said closing my door again.

I groaned and got up. If it wasn't for Chris I definitely wouldn't be here. I would have gone back home with Renee two years ago. Don't get me wrong I love my dad and all; it's just that I hate this weather, and I really miss my mom.

After brushing my hair and teeth, and putting on a brown shirt and jeans, I went downstairs to get a cereal bar out of the pantry. I looked at the clock, 6:45. I had to leave in 10 minutes. Man I hated how early school was. We started at 7:05 every day. It sucked.

After I ate I went to get all my stuff together, but a sudden knock on the door stopped me mid-way upstairs. I walked over and opened the door to see Chris standing there with a smile on his face.

He kissed me on the lips before he said anything. "Hey beautiful, are we riding to school together?"

"Sure, sure, just let me get my stuff. I'll be down in a sec," I said hurrying upstairs to get my backpack. Don't get me wrong, I really liked Chris and all, but I couldn't really see this relationship being a long term thing. Yes, we have been going out for almost two years now, but I just couldn't get to the love part.

In the car Chris would put his hand on my knee as he talked about this year and what he was thinking about for college. I on the other hand, wasn't thinking about college. I still had another year to worry about it. I didn't even know if I wanted to go yet.

"Bella, you have to go to college. It's the only way you could get a real life going," Chris said once I told him I wasn't even thinking about it.

"I know I should go and all, it's just that I'm so sick of working like this. I was thinking about taking a year off and maybe backpacking across Europe or something like that. Wouldn't that be fun?"

Chris laughed at me. "Baby, you don't want to carry a backpack around all of Europe. Besides you have never been one for the outdoors. What changed your mind?"

I turned my head away from him and stared out the window. I could see Forks High School coming into view. "I don't know. Maybe I won't go backpacking; I would just like to see the world or something. Maybe I'll go somewhere warm, and where it doesn't rain."

He chuckled to himself. He knew I hated this weather, yet he never offered to take me home for a long weekend or something. Charlie would have allowed it. He loves Chris.

We pulled into a parking spot right next to Angela Webber and her boyfriend Ben. I hopped out of the car, not waiting for Chris, and walked over to her. "Hey Ange, how was your summer?"

She looked over to me and smiled. "So much fun. I went to Los Angeles! It was so warm there. I loved it," she said. Then she leaned forward so that no one could hear us. "Did you see the new kids yet?" I shook my head. "They just moved here from somewhere. Their names are the Cullens. Jessica came and told me. She also said the boys were so hot. I really don't care though, and neither should you. I mean we both have boyfriends."

I smiled weakly. _For how long?_ I thought to myself. "Yeah, I mean I don't care at all."

"What's that around your neck?" Angela asked picking up my necklace to look at it.

I was a small silver key that I have been wearing all summer long. I haven't taken it off for one day. "Just something I got down in Phoenix."

She shrugged dropping it so it hit my chest. "It's really pretty."

"Thanks."

Chris walked me to my first period class with his arm around my waist. I, however, wasn't looking at him. I was trying to find a face that I didn't know. Though every face I past, I knew.

After going four periods without seeing a new face, I walked with Chris and Jessica to the cafeteria deciding that there were no new kids. Someone must have made up a rumor or something. Then I saw them. They were all so different, but they were all gorgeous. I was sort of jealous.

"Jessica, are those the new kids?" I asked nodding over to their table as we all headed towards the lunch line.

Jessica looked up to see who I was talking about. "Yea, the one on the left is Emmett, then Rosalie, Edward, Jasper, and Alice is the last one."

I looked at the one- Edward? - who had reddish brown hair and stared at him, not realizing I was. For some reason when I looked at him I felt safe. Like nothing could harm me as long as he was here. I know stupid right?

I didn't even notice that he was staring at me too. Once I noticed I quickly looked down blushing. I hope he didn't see that. Chris, however, was oblivious to everything right now. He was too busy talking to Mike about something.

"So where are they from?" I asked as we paid for our food.

"I got this babe," Chris said giving the lunch lady money.

"Chris you really don't have to do that," I protested.

"I know, but I want too," he said balancing his tray on one hand and putting his other arm around my waist again.

Jessica gave me I'll-tell-you-when-boyfriends-not-paying-attention look. Once we sat down Chris was right back into his conversation. I, however, turned my attention to Jessica who knew everything.

"Well something happened with one of the brothers and they got kicked out of their last school, which made Dr. Cullen move here. Though the thing is they aren't even his real children. They were all adopted."

"They all look a little old to be adopted," I said looking over to their table again.

"Oh they have been together since they were eight or so. But here is the scoop; apparently they are all together, like couple wise. Emmett and Rosalie are together and so are Jasper and Alice. Edward is the only one who is single," she said smiling.

Oh, no, I knew that look. That was the look she had when she was going to go after some guy. It was the same way with Mike, which did not turn out good. "Jessica, don't you dare. He's only been here for a few hours. He doesn't need someone hitting on him."

"Someone's jealous that she can't do anything," she teased me.

"Who's jealous of what?" Angela asked looking at me.

"Nothing and no you're wrong," I said with a stern voice.

"Whatever," Jessica said looking away from me.

You know I liked Jess and all, but sometimes it's seems like she just doesn't know when to stop talking. I looked over to the Cullens table. You could tell who the couple where if you looked carefully at them. They didn't seem like the PDA type, but if you watched closely you could see the bigger brother- Emmett? – brushing a piece of hair from Rosalie's face, and the blond boy- Jasper? – flirting with the small girl- Alice? The smallest one of all the boys, but not weak looking, was still staring at me. He met my gaze and I could see his gorgeous green eyes staring into my brown ones. It caught me so off guard I almost fell back into Chris.

My next class was Biology. I wasn't all for the subject, but it wasn't so bad. I mean you had to learn it right? Once I got there I looked for my name on the index card the teacher set out for us.

"Are you Isabella Swan?" a voice asked me as I found my name.

I looked up to see one of the Cullen's staring at me. "Bella," I corrected.

"Oh, right. My name is Edward Cullens," he said smiling. His smile wasn't perfect, but the way he put made my knees go weak.

"Hello," I said taking my seat as the teacher called the class to order.

"Ok class, my name is Mr. Banner. Welcome to Biology II. We won't start anything today, so I advise you to get to know your lab partner. These seats won't change the whole year, so enjoy!" he said with a wicked smile on his face.

"So how long have you been dating that kid?" Edward asked me suddenly.

I almost jumped, considering I wasn't expecting him to say anything. "What?"

"How long have you been dating that boy at lunch? Or are you guys just 'friends'?" he asked making the friends part sarcastic.

I rolled my eyes at him. "_Chris_ and I havebeen going out for two years on November… 5," I said thinking about the date. "Why do you care?"

He shrugged, but smiled. "I just wanted to know if I should tell him to back off or not."

"Wait, you don't even know me. Why would you tell him to back off?"

"I watched you walk to the table with him. You seemed uncomfortable, like you weren't sure if you should be there or not. You thought too much about it to be a serious relationship."

I stared at him in shock. He got all of that by just watching me. That's impressive because it was right. Everything he said was how I felt. I couldn't let him know it though. "What can I say, maybe I just over think things too much. Believe me though, it is a serious relationship."

He nodded, not believing me. "Okay then. Your turn."

I was so confused now. "My turn for what?"

"To ask me a question. Mr. Banner told us we should get to know our partners so that's what I'm doing, so now it's your turn."

I raised my eyebrow. This might be a long year. "Um, okay. What got you kicked out of your last school?"

He sighed looking down. Then he picked up his head and stared at him intently. "Who told you that?"

"No, no, no it was my turn for the question, remember?" Ha! Got him.

He rolled his eyes at me. "Fine, I'll answer it. My brother, Emmett, and I decided to pull a prank on the principle on the last day of school last year. Since my friend knew a contractor he gave us a number so that we could get the principles car onto the roof of the school. That's why were got expelled." He looked up at me to see my reaction. I tried to keep it as composed as possible. "Now answer my question."

"Jessica Stanley heard it from someone. I just heard this at lunch," I told him still trying to compose myself.

"Ah, I heard she is a gossiper. I think she tried hitting on me earlier today," he said. He seemed to be talking to himself then.

"Ugh, I told her not to do that. I guess I was too late though."

"What did you tell her not to do?" he asked snapping back into reality.

"I told her not to hit on you today because you were new to this school and you haven't even been here a whole day. Jessica can get clingy if you let her."

He looked at me for a second. He seemed to be studying me or something. His eyebrows came together and he cocked his head to the side. "Why did you tell her not to hit on me?"

I looked at him for a second shocked. I didn't think he would look too much into it. I looked at the clock, five minutes left. I could stall that long. "Um, well just like I said she can get kind of clingy."

"No, that's not it is it? Why did you tell her that?" he asked again.

"I don't know," I said looking down at the ground. "I guess I sort of just said it without even thinking about it. I mean when I first came here it seemed like people wouldn't give me enough room to breathe, but Chris wasn't one of them. He gave me space before coming to talk to me. I thought you might need it too."

I looked up to see his face softer than before. Maybe I said too much. He only nodded as the bell rang. Then he gathered his stuff and left me there staring at him leave. What just happened there?

Mike and I walked to gym next period, which was the worst class of all. I was so clumsy I could trip over a line! When it was finally over though Mike walked me out to the front of the building where Chris was waiting for me.

"Hey babe how was your first day of school?" he asked putting his arm around my shoulder while he nodded to Mike. The guy way of saying 'sup because it was so hard for them to do that.

"Um, alright I guess. I'm just glad it's over," I said. I looked over my shoulder and Chris's arm to see Edward talking to his family. They were all laughing about something. Once again I felt like I didn't belong here in Chris's arms. I belonged somewhere else.

* * *

A/N: Tell me if I should continue writing it or not! Please tell me I should, I really like my idea for this one, LOL.


	2. The Place All Along

A/N: Thank you guys so much for the reviews! You are keeping this story going! Anyways on with the next chapter!

June 2, 2008

I don't own anything!

* * *

Chris picked me up the next day and drove us to school, a place I really didn't want to go. I actually didn't even want to be in this car, a black jeep to be exact, at all. I needed to think. This isn't the only time I have had doubts about our relationship, however. Chris realizes it or something and shows me that we are perfect the way we are. The first time he bought me a ring that I wear on my right hand, middle finger, every day. The next time we spent the whole day alone on the beach by La Push. Not to worry because nothing major happened. The last time he took me on a boat ride. I wasn't crazy about it but it's the thought that counts. Now normally it gets so big that he notices about three weeks after my first thought.

This time was different. I normally didn't feel anything this strong until the third week. It's only been two days! I just felt this pull that was pulling me out of this life and putting me into another.

I know, I know, if you truly love someone they shouldn't need to show you how much they love/care about you. The thing is that I'm not in love with Chris. I thought by this time I would be, but I'm not even close. Bad, I know.

"Babe, are you okay? You've been really quiet this morning," Chris said stealing a glance at me.

I didn't look away from the window that was covered in water considering it was raining… again. I did though and looked into his big, worried blue eyes. _Don't make him suspicious_, I thought. " 'Course I am. I was just thinking," I said pushing a piece of brown hair out of his pale face, and smiled.

He narrowed his eyes at me, but then smiled back at me. He still couldn't tell I was faking it, and lying. "Good, you seemed sort of distracted yesterday. It's got me a little worried."

He worries too much. "I'm fine, really. No need to worry."

When we parked in the same spot as yesterday, I got out and found myself looking for someone. I just didn't know who. That was until I met a pair of green eyes.

Edward Cullen was also staring at me once my eyes found his. He smiled that same imperfect, yetperfect, smile at me. I found myself forgetting how to breathe.

"Hey Bella," Angela said coming up to me. "Are you okay? You're face is turning purple, I think."

I snapped back from my dazed expression and took a deep breath. Wow, how long was I holding my breath for anyways? "Oh, yeah I'm fine, just tired you know?"

She nodded. "Yeah I do. Ben kept me up all night because he was talking about some movie he saw. I just listened because I felt bad if I just hung up."

I shrugged. The last time Chris and I got into a fight I hung up on him three times. "Sure, I guess."

When Jessica and I met up with Chris after Spanish, he put his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him. I tried to ease up when we got to the cafeteria so I could prove Edward wrong. But once I saw him, I felt myself tense up. I couldn't relax knowing his eyes would be on me, studying me.

Once we sat down Angela leaned over the table to whisper something to me. "Edward Cullen, the new guy, is staring at you." She giggled sitting back in her chair.

I didn't turn around to see because I could feel his eyes on my back already. "What does he seem like?" I asked her.

She sat up a little straighter to see over my head and then back down at me. "I'm not entirely sure. He is smiling, but it seems like he is mocking you or something. What could that be about?"

I looked down at my tray studying my untouched pizza before answering her. "We were talking in Biology because he is my lab partner. Anyways he mentioned something about how I acted and I totally lied about it. I knew that he could tell I was lying though."

Angela raised her eyebrows. "Did he insult you about how he acted?" I shook my head. "Well then how did it sound?"

"It was just an observation. It was nothing big," I said shrugging as I took a bit of my pizza trying to be indifferent about the subject.

"Bella," a voice came from behind me as I made my way over to the Biology room after lunch.

I turned around to see who it was. Edward was the only person I could see. _Of course._

"Would you mind if I walked with you?" he asked falling into step beside me. I shook my head. "You seem awfully distracted," he said smiling. "Does it have anything to do with me?"

I almost stopped, but I made myself continue on with a little hesitation. "No, not at all. I've just been thinking a lot today."

"What have you been thinking about then?"

I shrugged. "Just things that have been bothering me lately."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with what I said to you yesterday, does it?" he asked in a teasing voice.

We had reached the Bio room then. I quickly took my seat before I answered him. How do you respond to that? I took a deep breath. "No it doesn't."

He stared at me for awhile before he turned back to the front of the room. I knew he could tell I was lying. How could he tell, but my own boyfriend couldn't? "I guess I'll just have to try harder," he said softly.

I stared at him blankly as Mr. Banner called attention to the class. This could not be happening to me. Is he just playing with my head, or does he actually like me?

"There you are baby girl," Chris said as Mike and I walked out of the gym. That's another thing that bothered me. Can he not just call me Bella?

"Here I am," I said smiling weakly back to him.

He put his arm around my shoulder as Mike went to Chris's other side to whisper something to him. He suddenly picked up his head and scanned the crowd of students. Then he seemed to find the person he was looking for because he nodded to Mike and they walked off together. I then scanned the crowd until I knew who they were going after. Edward.

I ran off towards them as they were approaching Edward. I didn't stop until I got to them, but by that time the fight had already begun.

"What the hell are you doing walking with my girlfriend Cullen?" Chris yelled at him.

Edward stopped in his tracks and looked at Chris and Mike like they were crazy. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"What gives you the right to walk _my_ girlfriend to Biology?" Chris asked walking up to Edward so they were only inches away from each other.

If Chris was thinking about fighting Edward he should really think again. Edward had at least a good inch and ten extra pounds of muscle. There is no doubt in my mind who would win.

"Does Bella need permission to talk to me, or is it the other way around?" Edward asked glaring at Chris.

"As long as you stay away from her then you won't have too," he snapped back.

Whoa, I didn't have to ask permission to do anything! Chris didn't have a right to control me. I was my own person! I wasn't going to be a trophy wife! Hell, if I wanted to I would join the army! Chris had no right to say I had to ask _permission_ to talk to any boy!

Edward looked over to Chris to me and called out, "Has he always been this controlling, or is he afraid of a little competition?"

That hit a nerve. Everyone could tell it did. And when Edward looked back at him with a smug face Chris lost it. He punched Edward right in the jaw. Mike and Tyler (from the crowd watching) got Chris by the arms trying to pull him back.

There was only one way of stopping this so I ran towards them stepping between both of them. "Stop!" I yelled. Everyone stared at me. "Chris, come with me! Edward, leave! Now!"

It was a silent ride home. I didn't want to talk to Chris at the moment, and I knew he was too ashamed of himself. When he came inside with me, we both sat down on the couch in silence.

"Bella," he whispered, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have punched him like that. It was a cheap shot. I know you're mad at me, but you didn't expect me to do nothing?"

"You shouldn't have even fought with him! You didn't have too," I snapped back at him still looking away from him.

"Of course I had to! I had to get him to back off of you! Mike told me he was all over you! Also that you let him, you didn't do anything! You didn't expect me to be like whatever I don't care what my girlfriend does with other guys. Well I'm not like that!"

"I expected you to come and talk to me about it! He was not all over me, we only talked. You know you can get suspended for this! It's only the second day of school and you already got into a fight! What are you afraid of him for?"

"I'm afraid of him stealing you away. I'm afraid of losing you. You know, I see all these girls all over the new guys and all these guys over the new girls. Most of them love the attention, but Edward seems to only have eyes for you. It freaks me out, okay? I had to get him to back off of you so he wouldn't kiss you or something."

"You think I would let him kiss me? I wouldn't! I would kiss him if I wanted too, but you have to understand that I'm not like that! I don't let guys walk all over me!"

"I know that," he scoffed.

"You know what Chris, if you don't like it then just leave! I'm sick of this! You have to control your temper and you need to learn when you come and talk to me first before 

beating someone else up! Don't be stupid because I can't deal with this anymore," I said walking towards the door.

"Bella, please don't go," he pleaded, but I was already out the door and in my truck.

Fifteen minutes later I stopped in a driveway of a house. I don't know why or how I got here. I just did. I stepped out of my car and walked up to the front door, and rang the door bell.

Edward opened the door with a dazed expression and ice on his chin. He stepped outside and onto the step where I was standing.

"Hey," I whispered, "how are you?"

He chuckled. "I've been better, but why are you whispering?"

"Chris doesn't know where I am. We just got into a huge fight and I just walked out of the house and found myself driving over here."

He smiled taking the ice off of his chin. "I'm glad you came then. I guess I was in your head today."

I smiled shyly. Then I noticed his chin. "Oh my god, look at your chin! It's all black and blue! Chris has hell to pay when he sees me next."

Edward took my hand gently. It felt so warm and nice. I loved it, but I forgot how to breathe again. "Bella, I'm okay. Don't worry; this isn't the worse one yet. It's actually nothing if you think about it." I looked at him shocked. "Hey, breathe," he said laughing.

I took a deep breath, blushing. "How is that not the worse one yet?"

"I've gotten into a ton of fights. Never over a girl though, but this one was defiantly worth it considering I'm here talking to the girl." He brushed my cheek with his spare hand. "I love the way you blush. You look so beautiful."

Wow, now I knew why I came here. "Thank you," I said softly looking down at the ground.

"Bella, why exactly are you here," he asked.

I shifted my weight not looking at him. "I don't know. I just needed to go to a place where I could find comfort and I knew I could find it with you for some reason."

He took a step closer to me. "You don't even know me. I could be a serial killer," he whispered.

I laughed. "I know you aren't though."

He took my chin in his hand and lifted up my face to look him in the eyes. "Are you and Chris still together?"

"Um… yes. I think at least. Who's really knows," I said starting to get nervous.

He laughed softly and then leaned in closer to me so that his face was an inch away from mine. "Well, only you really know."

I stood there completely shocked by how this all happened. I didn't think of this when I came here, but now I realized it was what I really wanted. "Yeah I guess I do, don't I?"

He nodded staring deeply into my eyes. Then he kissed me softly on the lips. He was about to pull away before I locked my arms around his neck pulling him closer to me.

This is what I wanted all along. Just getting back to where I was supposed to be would be the problem I wasn't ready to face.

* * *

A/N: I hoped you like it! It was kind of a short chapter, but the next one will be longer! I promise! Review please, and tell me what you thought!


	3. Trying To Get Back

A/N: Thank you to my loyal reviews. They make my day better considering I'm still stuck in school for another week… ugh. Anyways review and Penguins! Hehe I live in Pittsburgh so I'm a diehard Pens fan, who went into triple overtime on Monday and won! Oh, and in this chapter the normal characters are going to be really OOC, but just go with me here. They are still perfect:)

June 3, 2008

I don't own anything

* * *

Ah, it was heaven. No it was better than heave, it was paradise. Kissing Edward was probably the best thing I did in my life, but also the worst. I had a boyfriend! A real live boyfriend who was probably still at my house! What was I doing? Truth, I had no idea. I knew I shouldn't kiss him back, but I knew if I didn't I would regret it later so I just did. Until I realized I was getting in too deep for my own good.

"Edward," I said out of breath, "I can't do this."

He sighed putting his forehead on mine. He closed his eyes for a second and then looked straight at me. "I know. I shouldn't be making you do this. I mean you're still with _him_ right?" I nodded sheepishly. "Then you're cheating on him right now, you know that?"

I sighed pulling my head away from his. I turned around looking up at the gray sky. Surprisingly it hasn't rained since this morning. "I know that!" I snapped. "I didn't mean too, I just got caught in the moment. I mean you were here," I said turning around, "and you were hurt, but you were still kind to me. You didn't snap at me or judge me because of my… my boyfriend," I forced out the words. I could feel the tears gathering up in my eyes now.

Edward took my face in his hands again and kissed the top of my head. "Hey," he whispered, "calm down. Of course I was kind to you. I soon as I saw you, I was crazy about you. I still am. Bella, I can't seem to get you out of my head! It's like you are always in there! Don't worry though, it'll be okay."

I pulled back from him again. I could see the hurt in his face, but only for a second because he composed himself quickly. "No, Edward, it's not okay. I cheated on my boyfriend! Someone who really cares about me and thinks I'm perfect! And here I am kissing someone else. Someone who he hates!" The tears started coming then.

"I know," he said softly brushing a tear from my face. "I know. But Bella, you can't say you didn't want this as much as I did. You cannot live your life in a lie that you didn't want too."

I turned away from him and started to my truck. "I have to go. I'm sorry."

I couldn't look at his face as I pulled out of his driveway and started on the main road. Hopefully Chris wouldn't be at my house. Just thinking his name made me feel so much 

shame I could barely take it. I shouldn't have gone there. I shouldn't have even thought about going there. It was wrong! I should have stayed where I was and argued with Chris some more.

I parked my truck right outside of the house. A wave of relief came over me when I saw that Chris's jeep wasn't still parked in my driveway. Charlie wasn't home either which was another relaxing thought. He would be so disappointed in me right now. As a matter of fact most of my friends would be too. I couldn't talk to them about this. There was, however, one person I knew who wouldn't judge me.

I ran up to my room and turned on my computer. Of course today it chose to be the slowest thing possible. When it finally did come on, I wrote a heart-filled email to Renee:

Dear Mom,

I don't know what to do about boys anymore. Have you ever felt that way? So you know Chris, my boyfriend of two years in November? Well I like him a lot. I know you're probably wondering what the problem is then. Well there is a new kid at my school now. His name is Edward, and god his is gorgeous. I'm not just basing this whole thing on looks though. I really like him. He cares about knowing me. He told me that he's been crazy about me since he first saw me! He says he can't get me out of his head. I mean he has only known me for two days, but he seems like certain to get me to realize that I like him the same way he likes me and I sort of found out today.

Chris and Edward got into a fight today after school when Chris found out that Edward walked me to Biology because he is in the same class as me and is my lab partner. Anyways after school Chris and I got into this _huge_ fight about it because he punched Edward in the jaw! So I stormed out and found myself driving to Edward's house. There we talked about things and the next thing I know he's kissing me! My head went into a cloud and I got lost in the moment, until my head screamed at me that I already have a boyfriend. Then Edward was just like 'You can't say you didn't want this as much as I did.' I just walked away then because I couldn't face the truth. I did want it as much as he did. I just couldn't admit it because of Chris. Mom, I don't know what to do about this! Chris doesn't know. Actually no one knows besides you and Edward. Please help me and write back ASAP!

Love your horrible daughter,

Bella

I reread it about a dozen times wondering how much she would judge me once she sees it. I mean as I reread everything that happen I realized how horrible I was to Chris. I couldn't just go off and kiss some guy I've only known for two days just because we got into a fight. I just couldn't do that. It's not fair, but then again, life isn't fair.

Ugh what am I saying? Of course life's not fair! Otherwise Chris and I would be the perfect couple and completely happy because none of this would have happened. Though in my mind I knew it wouldn't be Chris that was with me in a fair and perfect world. I knew my answer; I just couldn't face it yet.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

The next day I told Chris to not pick me up. I wasn't ready to face him yet. I couldn't face him and pretend that he was still the bad guy when the thing he did was nothing compared to what I did. What am I going to do?

When I got to school I parked in a neutral area. Away from Chris and away from Edward. It was only fair that way. Though it wasn't helpful when Jessica was the first person when I got out of my truck.

"So did you hear?" Jessica said jumping next to me.

"Hear what?" I asked sounding annoyed and tired. I hadn't slept at all that night. I waited by my computer for my mom, and then when I finally gave up a wave of shame came over me again.

"Edward apparently is off the market," she said sulkily.

"What do you mean?" I asked suddenly surprised. How could he be when he just admitted to me that he has been crazy about me?

"Well he doesn't have a girlfriend," I sighed internally, "but he doesn't not have one either."

I was so confused by this point. How could you not have a girl but not have one either? Is that even possible? "Huh?"

Jessica sighed. Apparently I wasn't getting something that I should be. "Like he doesn't have one, but he won't look at anyone else. He only sees one person. You know?"

I caught my breath. Did she know who? Was it me? Was it someone else? "Do you happen to know how that it?" I choked out. My voice gave it all away.

Luckily she wasn't paying attention. "I have no idea. No one does. That's the thing. He won't tell anyone, like not even Ben who is apparently his friend now. Only his family knows. Or so I've been told. Today was the first day he hasn't laid eyes on anyone for more than five seconds. Though people have been saying one name the most," she said raising an eyebrow at me.

_Oh, no._ "What name is that?"

"Yours. Apparently he seems to only look at you whenever he sees you, but he hasn't seen you yet today. Maybe that's why…" she trail off. She then grabbed my arm and pulled me out into the open.

_Well there goes my hiding spot,_ I thought to myself. She then dragged me across the parking lot to where Edward, Emmett and Jasper were. She stopped, looked at him then to me, and then turned around to face me.

"Well it's not yours," she said sounding disappointed.

"How can you tell?"

"He's not looking at you, is he?"

I looked over her shoulder to Edward. No, he wasn't looking at me. He didn't even seem to notice I was standing five feet away from him. He was just talking to Emmett and Jasper, not paying attention to anyone. "No, no he isn't."

The day went by in a blur. I didn't talk to Chris at all because I was too afraid of what might come out, but he thought that I was still mad at him for everything. Lunch was useless. I didn't really talk to anyone and Edward didn't even look at me. Biology was probably the worst because I had to sit by him the whole time. He didn't look at me, or even glance down at me. His hands were clenched into a fist as he stared at the board in front of us. Why did I make this mistake?

When school was finally over I walked over to my truck without even looking at anyone until I ran into someone, big. I looked up to see who could have gotten into my way when everyone could tell I didn't want to be bothered. It was Edward. Why was he standing by my car?

"Edwa-"I started until he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side of the building which was only a few feet from my car.

Then he looked around to see if anyone was around and then bent down to kiss me, passionately. What was he doing? Wait, what was I doing? Well, right now I was actually kissing him back. I realized I longed for his kiss. I missed it. I wanted it. I needed it.

When we finally parted, both panting, he took me deeper into the side of the building and pulled me close to him. "I know you wanted it as much as I did. If you didn't you wouldn't have kissed me back," he whispered in my ear.

I looked down, burying my head into his chest. What was I going to do? "Edward, I just can't though. I couldn't do this to Chris. You know that, right?"

He sighed deeply. "Yes, I know. I understand, but I can't stand here and not be with you. I need you too. You're like my brand of heroine."

I laughed softly. No one has ever said something that _strong_ to me before. "Edward, I don't want you to get hurt. You know I probably won't break up with Chris yet. I just feel terrible about it. I don't think we can do this."

Edward's eyes bore into mine. "Bella, I don't care, well I do, but I really just want to be with you. I don't care about all the other people as long as you are here. As long as I have you I don't care."

Wow. I never thought any guy would be that understanding. I knew if I was him I definitely wouldn't be that way. Hell, I'd be pissed if someone told me that. No wonder I liked him so much. "You'd do that for me?"

He nodded kissing me again. "I'm not going to look at you during the day because people have been spreading rumors about us. They won't come true until you break up with Chris though. I promise you that."

"You are amazing. I just don't know if I can be like you. I don't know if I could walk around like nothing is happening. I'm not that good at this stuff."

"Don't worry. You'll get used to it and you'll get better at it," he said laughing.

I went home to an empty house, so I walked upstairs to see if Renee did get back to me. She did, and when I first read it I thought she was disappointed, but later I learned she was warning me.

Bella,

I just read your email. Sorry it took me so long, but things are busy here. You never told me you were even having trouble with Chris. What happened? You two were so perfect and happy together when he came down here last summer with you. Is this Edward just a bad guy? If so, I understand where you are coming from because every girl goes for a bad guy. If this is the real deal for you then you have to break it off with Chris. You know you will just get caught in your own lie and end up getting no one and losing most of your friends. Do you really want that? Better question, are you willing to go to the risk of losing everything for this guy?

How long have you known this guy anyways? I haven't ever heard of you mentioning him before this. I read all your emails and nothing with his name. It's only the third day of school. How could you know if you really like someone that you have only known for three days? Do you think is fate, or that he's you soul mate? Honey, you have to think of what could happen to you if something goes wrong with this _thing_ you have going on with Edward. You don't want to ruin your life. If you think it's the real deal though, then follow your heart. Don't do what everyone else thinks you should do.

Lots of love,

Mom

When I went downstairs to make dinner for Charlie there was a knock on the door. My heart started racing thinking that maybe Edward wanted to see me more than just the side of the school, but when I opened it my heart dropped two stories.

"Chris, what are you doing here?" I asked trying to hide my disappointment.

"Bella, we really have to talk. Can I come in?" he asked.

I stepped back from the door as he came in and sat on the couch. I took one long look outside. It looked like it was going to rain soon. Maybe good things can happen with the rain…

I shut the door and walked over to where Chris was sitting. The same spot as yesterday when we fought. Maybe this was fate. Like this was supposed to happen this way…

"Babe, you have to understand how sorry I am. I've missed you so much. You have no idea how much. I would have done this last night after you stormed out of here, but I thought you might need some space to cool down. Now I think is the right time to tell you I can't lose you."

I sat there shocked for a second. He can't lose me? Be real. "What do you mean you can't lose me?"

"I went around today like we broke up and I wasn't happy, at all. I dreaded the day. I just wanted to go home and run around town for hours so that I could clear my head. I can't go a day without knowing I have you."

You don't _have_ me. No one _has_ me. I'm my own person. No one owns me. "Chris you did make it through the day though. I know that you could do it again if you had too."

He nodded looking down. "You're right. I can if I _have_ to. That's the thing though. I don't_ want_ too. I don't want to go another day knowing I don't have you. It sucks. Bella, I really can't lose you."

Yea well I can't lose other people, but I live without them. "Chris what exactly are you saying?"

"I love you," he spit out.

My eyes went wide. I wasn't expecting this. I didn't want this. This made this ten times harder. My head couldn't process this that fast. My head said just say yes, but my heart immediately said NO!

Chris's face dropped. I realized then I hadn't said anything for a long time. "Chris I don't… I mean this is… we're just so… so young."

He nodded sadly. "I understand, but I'm not going to just run away because you can't say it yet. I have thought about this for actually a long time. I just didn't know how to tell you. Who knew it would help me win you back." _Who said you won me back?_ I thought. "Just think about it. Clear your head and just think about it."

I nodded looking down at the couch which I sat on. He walked over and kissed the top of my head. "I'll pick you up tomorrow morning for school," he whispered. "Bye."

Then he walked out the door. I, however, just sat there. This didn't happen. This wasn't supposed to happen. I was trying to get him to realize that he could live without me so that maybe it would be easier for me, but instead he did the opposite and made it so much harder. Telling me he loved me. I never thought those words were even in his vocabulary.

This so was not happening. Maybe this whole week was just a dream. Maybe it was still the night before school starts. That means no Edward, no cheating, no agreeing to keep cheating, and no I love you! Four days ago my life was so simple. Now it was one of the most complicated things I have ever seen.

I went back to the kitchen to finish dinner for Charlie. When he got home and we ate I went upstairs. I had to get my head cleared. Wait when do you get to clear your head in a complicated life anyways? Answer, never.

Edward was sitting on my window seal waiting for me to come upstairs. How the hell did he get up there? How long was here for? What did he hear?

"Edward, what are you doing here? How did you climb that tree?" I asked closing my door quickly.

"Well, I don't think Chief Sawn would like his daughter making out with the kid everyone hates in his house. So I climbed a tree and got in through the window," he said hopping off and walking over to me.

"How did you even know that this is my room?" I asked as he took my hands in his. Ugh, I really wanted to clear my head.

"Let's just say Emmett is really good at finding thing out," he said laughing.

Great. "Oh, no, your family probably hates me for what I'm doing! They probably think I'm the worst person ever!"

"Don't worry, Bella. You worry way too much. They don't even know. It's just you and me who know about us."

I nodded, sighing in relief. At least his family wouldn't hate me. "Why didn't you tell them then?"

He sat in the rocking chair that I had sitting in the corner of my yellow room, and then he pulled me onto his lap. "Well one, I didn't want them to hate you. Two, they would be either pushing me to get out of it, or telling me to fight harder and that would make it ten times 

harder for both of us. Three, I sort of like this secret thing. It's fun sneaking around, don't you think?"

I tried not to smile, but it was sort of fun to know something no one else knows and should never find out. "Sort of is the right word I think."

He laughed at me rubbing my back with his hand. "I thought maybe we could get to know each other better. That way it's deeper, you know?"

I nodded. "What do you want to know?"

"Don't you want to know anything?"

"I'll have my turn to ask questions."

"Okay then. Why did you move here?"

I thought about it for a second. "Well I lived with Renee, my mother, for most of my life. I only saw Charlie once a month in the summer. Anyways Renee started getting serious with her boyfriend, Phil, and I thought it might be nice if I let them have the year to themselves to see how things turned out. So I moved up here with Charlie. They actually ended up getting married that summer, and I was going to move back, but then Chris and I started to get serious, so I stayed for him."

"You seemed unhappy here though. Did you start to regret your decision to stay here or something?" he asked studying my face.

I took a deep sigh. "Truth? Yes, I was. I wanted to be somewhere where it didn't rain every day, and I missed my mother. She was like my best friend before I moved here. I missed her. Now, however," I said leaning into him, "I'm glad I stayed."

He chuckled kissing the top of my head. "I'm glad you stayed too. You know how you seemed to be searching for something your whole life, but not realize it until you have it?"

I nodded closing my eyes and laying my head on his chest. "Well I realized you are what I have been searching for. You are the one I _cannot_ lose," he said softly.

There it was the little bell that went off in my head. Crap, this is going to be very hard.

* * *

A/N: Ok so I wrote the story in less time than I thought I would. I didn't think I would update again today, but it looks like I will. So I hope you like it! This probably will never happen again by the way.


	4. Author Note

A/N: It's finally summer for me!! Anyways now that it is I'm going to tell you guys the dates I won't be near a computer so I can't update so people won't get mad at me for not updating...

**June 15-21: Appalachia (Church work camp thing)**

**July 13-17: Bethany Soccer Camp (Leaving on my birthday:( )**

**July 17-19: CalU Basketball Camp**

Sorry guys but if I have a chance I will try to update as soon as I get home, or sometime then. I have one more day here in the Burgh so I'll try to update the stories that I haven't updated in awhile (A/N: Back to the Beginning and I Won't Disagree and maybe Not Always You and Me). Sorry for making everyone wait longer then they want to, but summer is actually really busy for me... it sort of sucks.


	5. Barriers

A/N: I'm home, and sore. Anyways sorry it took me awhile, but here's the next chapter.

I'm going to say this in every one of my stories, but please, please, don't give me a hard time about not updating my story like every day. It's getting sort of annoying. It's just hard to update 5 stories with all the stuff I have going on. I mean I now have soccer and basketball preseason workouts so it may be awhile. Just hang in there please. It would be great. Anyways, enjoy the next chapter…

June 24, 2008

I don't own any Twilight that credit goes to Stephanie Meyer.

* * *

Work, a four letter word. Thankfully it's my last day before Christmas. For some reason I got off of work all during Christmas break. Not that I was complaining or anything. Though it was the only time Chris would stop bothering me about not saying anything to his shout of love. And yes, he told me he loved me in September, but I still couldn't say it back. Maybe it's a sign, but Carla didn't say yes until a week after Turk proposed to her on _Scrubs_. Yes, I know, that's a TV show and this is real life, but who knows really?

Maybe the reason I couldn't say that I loved him was because of my fling with Edward… and I was falling for him _hard_. I mean I loved Chris, I really do, but I don't know if I am _in_ love with him. Maybe that was my problem.

I haven't talked to Renee anymore on my situation. One, I don't like her judging me on the subject. Two, Chris almost read the first email I wrote to her. Three, she actually thinks I broke it off with Edward, which I clearly didn't or else I wouldn't be worrying about this.

Maybe I should have before I got this deep into it, but what's life without a little adventure? A little risk? Ah, who am I kidding he's the guy all the girls want and all the boys hate. Besides, ever since I first saw him all I wanted to do was be with him and look into his green eyes. He dazzled me constantly with them.

"Bella, are you off work yet?" Alice asked. Yes, we became friends. Edward and I had a Bio project one week so I spent every day with him, which helped me become friends with his whole family, minus Rosalie. She didn't like me because of Chris. Alice told me.

"Um, almost," I said pressing a few buttons on the cash register. I've been working at Mike's outdoors shop for a few months now. It was pretty easy I must say.

Alice nodded and hopped onto the counter. Mike gave her a dirty look. None of my _old_ friends like my _new_ friends at all. They were still nice to me, however, but if Chris and I broke up they would all go with him no doubt. I must admit I was sort of afraid of that.

"Mike, could I get out of here early?" I asked as he walked over to the tackle boxes and started rearranging them.

Mike looked at the clock and then back to me. "Ah, what the hell. Go ahead, shop is slow anyways. What are you doing tonight?"

"Alice and I are going to a movie then probably back to her house for a bit."

"Who's at her house?" he asked. If Chris wasn't around then Mike would take over the job of finding out where I was going, who was going to be there, and then he would report back to Chris. Annoying much?

"Um probably Jasper and her parents. Edward, Emmett and Rosalie when camping this weekend. Right Alice?"

Alice nodded, but she was smiling a wicked smile for some reason. "Yep, they are _all_ camping. I have no idea when they are coming home…"

I gave her a confused look, but she only smiled. I shook my head and hung up my vest. "Ok, well, I'm gonna go. Are you coming over for the Christmas Eve party Mike?"

"Yeah, I'll be there with Chris," he said.

"Okay see you later," I said as Alice and I headed to the automatic doors. When we got into the care I just had to ask, "What was the smile for?"

Alice flashed another smile before she answered me. "Well, we aren't going to a movie anymore. We are going to my house though." She paused. "So, what's do you think about Edward?"

I bit my lip. Why was she asking? Was there an actually reason? "Why do you ask, Alice," I asked as all the blood rushed to my cheeks. _Damn_.

"Oh please Bella. You guys have a strong chemistry. Either you guys are madly in love and aren't telling anyone, or you just don't realize it yet. I'm putting my money on the first."

"Alice, I don't know what you are talking about," I said trying to keep my voice strong and convincing. Didn't work…

"Ok then you won't mind seeing a movie with Jasper and Edward at my house," she said turning into her driveway.

"Alice! Why would you do that? It was just supposed to be us. Who else is going to be at your house?"

"No one. Just you, me, Jasper and Edward. What can I say? Everyone changed their plans at the last minute."

She turned off the car and got out. I took a deep breath before opening the car door. I walked slowly to the front door where Alice was waiting for me. She smiled at me, I scowled back, as she opened the door to let me in.

I walked into the foyer and out of the corner of my eye I saw Jasper already in the living room. I turned around and sighed, relieved that _he_ wasn't there yet.

Alice walked past me and giggled as she found her way to Jasper's lap. I, however, slowly started walking to the living room until a hand pulled mine and my body behind the wall.

Before I could even think Edward's lips crashed to mine. I pulled away quickly and whispered, "Edward they will hear us and probably notice that I'm gone soon."

He smiled his crooked smile. "I just wanted to say hello Bella. Relax, they probably haven't even noticed you're gone," he whispered back. Then he gave me a quick kiss and gently pushed me into the living room.

I walked into the room ungracefully and sat on the couch smiling. "So, what movie are we watching?"

"Well, we have _Fools Gold, Dirty Dancing, _and _John Tucker Must Die_ to choose from," Alice said as Edward walked into the room. He was also wearing the same dazed smile that I was. Not that it was obvious at all. Yeah right… "What do you think Edward?"

He looked at her shocked for a bit before he snapped back into reality. "Um _Fools Gold_. It has action and a love story. So, I think it might be fitting."

"Bella," Alice asked.

"Oh, um, that's fine. That's the only one I haven't seen yet, so I think it's good."

She nodded and got up to put it in the DVD player. Edward casually made his way over to the couch and sat next to me. The weird part was I actually relaxed when he sat down. It was nice to have his leg touching mine.

After the movie was over Alice and Jasper left to go upstairs while I made my way over to the door to go home.

"Bella," Edward said coming up beside me, "do you want to take a walk?"

"Yea, I do," I said quietly.

He opened the door and let the cold December wind hit us. Surprising it was relatively warm for winter. We walked down his driveway and into the woods. I shivered when the wind started to pick up so Edward put his arms around me and held me close. We must have walked for an hour or a little less because we were right next to my house.

"You didn't have to walk me home, you know?" I said.

He shrugged smiling. "Yea, well, this way I got to spend a longer time with you alone. Driving you home may have been warmer, but far to faster for me."

I smiled back. "I'm not complaining about the cold. You've kept me pretty warm."

He raised an eyebrow before kissing me slowly, but still had passion behind it. We broke when we realized we needed oxygen. I put my head on his shoulder not wanting to leave, but I knew I had too anyways.

"I have to go," I whispered.

"Don't."

I groaned. "I don't want to, but I _have _too. Charlie will be wondering where I am."

"And Chris too, no doubt," he said bitterly.

"Edward, you know I just… just-"

"I know, I know, but why?"

I backed away from him so I could look at him fully. "Because. It's not that simple."

"What's not simple about it Bella?" I asked harshly. "Going up to him and telling him you don't want him anymore? Is that so hard to do?"

"Yes, okay?! I don't know why, but I just can't!"

His expression turned from angry to disappointed. "You're afraid of what everyone will think, right?" I shook my head, but he could see past my lie. "Bella, who cares about what the other people think about you! The only thing that matters is what you think. Forget about them. What do you want? What do you want, Bella?"

I just stared at him. No one has ever asked me that before. How would I answer? It had to be safe. That's all I knew. "I should go."

He let me. I thought he was going to stop me and make me tell him something he should have known. I wanted him, but it's not as simple as saying it.

I walked through the door without looking back. My eyes were watering up. I don't think I'll make it to the stairs before I break. Before I flood the downstairs with my tears. No, now I won't be able to make it two steps.

"Bella?" Charlie's voice asked as I closed the door.

_Crap now I have to deal with him_. "Yea dad?"

"I didn't hear a car. How did you get home?" he asked coming down the stairs to where I stood.

I turned my head towards the TV so I could gather my tears. "Um, Edward, Alice's older brother, walked me home."

"That's a long way to walk."

"It wasn't that bad." _Until the end._

Charlie nodded before heading over to the couch. "Bella, will you sit please?"

"Um sure?" I said making my way to a couch. "What's up dad?"

"I want to talk to you about this Edward kid. I don't trust him. I've heard thing around town. People are saying he only goes for the sweet innocent, and… taken girls. I've heard he uses them and then leaves them broken hearted." He paused. "Chris also told me about what happened in school. Because of that kid _your_ Chris got suspended for three says. Why would you hang out with him after that?"

"One, Chris is not _my_ Chris. He's just Chris my boyfriend. Two, it was Chris's fault. _Edward_ didn't do anything wrong. Chris just overreacted. Three, I don't believe that Edward just uses girls. If you got to 

talk to him before you judged him you would know he could never do that," I snapped as I got up, walked to my room and slammed the door shut. I clasped onto my bed and let my tears flow out of my eyes.

It wasn't supposed to hurt this much.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I rolled over, but to the wrong side, which made me fall out of my bed onto the floor. I wasn't sure what happened last night until I looked down and saw that I had the clothes that I had on last night. Then I remembered the fight with Edward, and the fight with Charlie. Ugh, it seemed like the whole world was out to get me!

I got off the floor and took a shower. After I put on some clean clothes I walked down to the kitchen for something to eat. I got out a cereal bard and walked to the counter where a note was laying:

_Bella,_

_The party is tonight! Go out and get some pop and food for it. Be home by four o'clock to set up everything and get ready! People will be coming around six. If you need to invite more people, go ahead just run them past me_ (meaning no Edward)._ Don't be late!_

_Love Dad_

I groaned and looked at the clock hanging on the wall. 1:30. Wow, I slept a long time. When did I fall asleep? Well I came home around 11:45. Charlie and I's conversation/fight lasted maybe 15 minutes. I think I cried for two hours maybe. Hmm… I should not stay up that late anymore.

After getting some pop (or soda depending on where you live) and chips, dip, wings, and other food; I came home to get ready. I put on a jean skirt and ruby red shirt that had that bigger top style, but squeezed around the waist. Then I put on the heard shaped necklace Edward got me for Christmas and the bracelet Chris got me.

Have you ever been surrounded by a ton of people, friends included, but still feel alone? That's how I felt right now. Even with Chris standing by my side, I felt _alone_. I didn't feel whole at all. Like a part of me was missing.

"Chris I'm going to get a drink," I said quiet loudly. The music was pretty loud in here.

"Do you want me to get it for you, baby?"

I shook my head. "No, no I'll get it."

I made my way to the kitchen to pour myself some Coke and when someone tapped me on the shoulder. "Hey Jess, what's up?"

"Hi Bella, I was just wondering how you do it?" she asked smugly.

"Do what?"

"Please like you don't know what I'm talking about." I shook my head. "Fine I'll give you a hint. Let's see, last night by the edge of the forest with a Mr. Edward Cullen. So how do you do it? I mean without anyone knowing?"

I looked at her shocked. How could she see us? It was pitch black. "What do you mean? We were just talking."

"What, with your tongue down his throat? I wish I had a conversation with Edward then," she said with a smirk.

_Crap there is no way out of this one_. "What can I do that will make you not say anything?" I pleaded with her.

She thought about it for a second. "Stay away from him so that I can go to the dance with him in January. That means no 'conversations' with him. How about you just don't talk to him either, unless you want it to go around the whole school."

I really had no choice in the matter. "Deal."

The rest of the night went by in a blur. People talked, laughed, dance and then left. Once everyone was gone I went up to my room and changed to get ready for bed. I wasn't looking forward to anything anymore. Edward was probably still pissed at me, and if he wasn't I couldn't talk to him anyways. Jessica just had to see us. How could she even see us? It was so dark out last night.

_Tic. Tic._

I looked at my window. What the?

I walked over to see what was happening. I opened the curtain and opened the window as wide as it would go so that I could lean my body out to see down below. When I looked I saw Edward holding rocks in his hands.

"Sorry if I woke you, I just need to talk you, Bella. Please come down," he pleaded.

I hesitated, thinking about Jessica's words:_ unless you want it to go around the whole school._ I pulled myself back into my room and closed my window. I walked over to my rocking chair and got my sweatshirt off of it, and walked downstairs.

I crossed my arms across my chest and walked up to Edward slowly.

"Bella, I'm so sorry about last night. I don't know why, but I just snapped. And today, when I actually realized what I did, all I could think of was that look on your face when I yelled at you. It was the only picture of you I had in my head. I hated it because I love seeing you smile. I love seeing you blush constantly, but I couldn't because all I saw was your hurt expression last night. I can't deal with that Bella. I have to see you smile. I live for your bright expression every time I see you. It makes my life ten times better. I can't bear to see you hurt."

_Well then get ready for some heart ache and life worsening-ness._ "Edward I can't… I can't…" the tears were falling down my face at this point. I couldn't do it. I couldn't just end it. I wasn't ready to say goodbye.

I walked up to him and kissed him on the lips, but pulled away too quickly. "Edward, I can't do this anymore. It's not me and I can't make it me."

"Do what? This sneaking around? I can't do it either. It's killing me not being able to say I have the greatest girl in the world at my side. Look, I know you're worried about what your friends think, so let leave. Let's go to a different school if we have-"

"No, Edward, listen. I can't do this," I said waving between us, "anymore. I can't do us. I'm sorry, I just… just can't."

I saw the hurt on his eyes. He was crushed, but so I was I. I wiped my eyes with my sleeve and then turned around and ran back into the house. I closed the kitchen door behind me and let my back hit it. I sank slowly to the floor and brought my legs up to my chest and hugged myself. Then I buried my face in my knees and rocked slowly back and forth.

It wasn't supposed to be this complicated. It wasn't supposed to be this hard to say goodbye. It wasn't supposed to hurt as much as it did. I wasn't supposed to feel a hole in my heart as soon as I said I couldn't do it. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

It wasn't supposed to be as real as it was to me.

* * *

A/N: I know, I know they aren't supposed to break up like this, but I can't help it. They need obstacles or else it wouldn't be real to me. Don't worry though; it won't be like this forever. Tell me what you think though.


	6. Realizing the Truth

A/N: Okay I didn't get as many reviews as I was hoping, but this idea just popped into my head as I was coming home from soccer. So I hope you like it! _Italic _means Bella's story, by the way.

June 26, 2008

I don't own anything still…

* * *

Alice and I were sitting in English class listening to Mr. Long talk about… something. See Alice changed into my period for some reason. So now we sat be each other not paying attention to a thing, but then Mr. Long started talking about a new assignment that got me listening very, very closely.

"Okay class, this assignment is due tomorrow, but it should be easy for everyone. I want you to right a short story about something most teens would understand. It could be about a football game, or soccer game. Maybe it's about a guy who can't pick which girl he's going to take to the dance two weeks from now. Just pick something and write about. Don't worry if it's not perfect. Just let yourself go!"

He started to hand out paper to everyone. When I got mine I looked at it for a second deciding what I should write about. I could write about moving to a new school, or meeting someone different from everyone else. Then an idea came to my mind.

So my story goes like this:

_There was this girl who had a perfect life. A terrific boyfriend who would always be there for her, some great friends who knew how to make her feel better, a great home to live in, and is a great student. She did have an enemy though. This person was out to make sure that she didn't have everything that she wanted._

_The thing this girl really wanted was to actually be in love. She couldn't get that with the boyfriend she was with, however. She found it with this new boy. He was strong, handsome, and caring. He had an old fashion vibe to him sometimes, which made him more of a gentleman than most boys her age._

_Her enemy, however, did not like that she was getting something else that could be added to her list of great things. She was out to make sure that the girl couldn't have the love of her life, in her life. So the enemy made a plan to get rid of the boy. She blackmailed the girl. She told the girl that if she didn't back off of the boy then she would tell the whole school her secret._

_The girl naturally didn't want this to happen because she was afraid of what her friends would think. So the girl ended; she hasn't been the same since. The enemy played all the tricks she could and ended up with the boy, for the time being. _

_The girl felt like her heart was taken out of her chest and stabbed repeatedly by her enemy. You see the enemy would just dangle the boy in front of the girl. Just to show her that she had him._

_The girl realizes something, however. She has to end it with her boyfriend. It's not fair for her not to be in love with him whenever he is in love with her. Whenever she does, though, it won't really matter will it? The boy she is in love with has already gotten over her, so she'll still have a broken heart. It matters because she will feel better about herself, and maybe she'll move home to where she can just start over. Maybe then she will feel whole again._

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I walked down to the cafeteria by myself today. I pretty much ran out of my class so I wouldn't have to walk by Jessica and Edward walking down the hall hand and hand together. It seemed like everywhere I went they were there. Kissing, touching, and holding each other. It sucked.

Alice caught up to me though. "Yuck. Jessica and Edward should get a room or something. I hate when they are all PDA. It's so annoying. Like it's not cute, it's gross."

I mumbled 'yeah' and kept walking. I wasn't in the mood to talk about them. I was barely in the mood to talk to anyone who actually liked Edward, let alone someone who was his sister.

"Bella, are you okay? You've haven't been yourself since Christmas Eve. What happened that night? I mean Edward suddenly came home not talking to anyone and you wouldn't answer my calls. Then this," she said waving over to Edward and Jessica holding hands in the lunch line, "happens. What's the deal?"

I shrugged. "I don't know, Alice. Things just haven't been going my way, at all."

"We miss you, you know? I mean Emmett, Jasper and I. We all miss you. You're never over anymore. I know it may not seem like it, but Edward misses you terribly. Whenever he looks at you his eyes always look so longing. You know?"

"Well I guess it's a good thing that he doesn't look at me that much."

"Bella, what happened?"

"Sorry, I'm not hungry Alice. I'm just going to go to the library and work on my short story for Mr. Long's class. I'll see you later, okay?"

She nodded. "Yea, later."

I walked into the silent library. No one was in there probably because it's lunch and social time. Ugh, I've always hated lunch. It's just annoying sometimes. Mostly whenever it's snowing because on the way to it people start snow ball fights and I always end up in the middle of one that Mike and Chris start.

I sat down in a car that was surrounded by bookcases. No one would notice me back here.

_The girl walked to the cafeteria hoping she wouldn't see the boy anytime soon, but when has life ever been that great? As soon as she stepped foot into the lunch room the boy was there holding hands with her enemy in the lunch line._

Of course,_ the girl thought to herself. She walked over with her head held high, so she didn't make people wonder why she wasn't herself lately. The boy looked at her though with longing eyes. He seemed to know why they couldn't be together anymore. It wasn't because of the girl's boyfriend; it was because of the girl between them. The girl who was so jealous she had to break up a couple who happened to be together by fate._

_Maybe it wasn't fate though. The girl wasn't even sure if she believed in fate, or soul mates for that matter. Sure she always believed that some people are just perfect together, but she wasn't sure if she believed that there is someone out there for everyone. Some people are just destined to be alone. _

_That's what she thought she was. Ever since this 'affair' happened with the boy, she no longer believed in fate, or soul mates. She also stopped believing in promises._

I stopped where I was remembering those words Edward had said to two months ago. _"Bella, I promise I will never hurt you. I will never leave you alone. I promise you that. I care about you too much to do something like that."_

Some promise that was. He didn't keep one of his 'promises'. He hurt me every time I saw him with Jessica. He left me alone. Well not physically, but emotionally I was alone. Also, there is no way he cared about me if he got over me in four days.

Yep, Jessica started working her plan the day after Christmas and went out with Edward on the 28 of December. When Angela called me to tell me that I must have cried the rest of the night and most of the next day. It was like he literally ripped out my heart and stomped on it at that point.

_The girl stopped believing in promises for two reasons. One was if you're never promised anything then you will never be disappointed. Two was the boy made her a promise he broke four days after she ended things._

_The girl knew that he would break it as soon as she ended things, she just didn't think it would hurt as bad as it did. She didn't think anything would hurt that much. It was like her heart literally ached every time she saw them. She also never felt whole._

_She felt like there was this huge hole in her heart. A hole that could only be filled by the boy, but she knew that would never happen, so she just held her head up high and tried to forget things._

_The girl was sitting with her boyfriend and her friends like every day, but this day was different. She realized something she always knew, but was afraid to do. She had to break up with her boyfriend and she would do it today. She decided. It's going to be over, and that's all she knew._

I stopped writing and dropped my pencil to the floor. It was what I knew. I had to do it, and I would do it today. I had too. Even if it doesn't get me Edward back, I had to do it. I knew I should have realized this a long time ago, but better now than never.

The bell rang then. Biology. I groaned. I hated this class more than ever whenever we got back from holiday break. I couldn't even get Mr. Banner to let me switch seats. Even though I tried and tried again, but he told me, and I quote, 'I told you from the started that these seats are your seat for the rest of the year. I'm sorry if you suddenly don't like your lab partner, but you just have to suck it up.'

I shook my head as I gathered up all my stuff and walked to my next class. _He_ was already there by the time I got there. _Fantastic_.

I sat down not looking at him, but I could feel his eyes on me. I flipped my hair behind my shoulder hoping he would see I took off his necklace, and replaced it with my key necklace. I think he did because he suddenly looked away and the rest of the class he never looked at me again.

I must say I was a little relieved, but I was curious. Why would he care so much about a necklace he gave me? I mean he was with Jessica and as far as I was concerned, probably already got her a necklace or a bracelet, or something. Why should he care if a took off one necklace and put on another?

Mr. Banner was apparently done teaching for the day so I took the time to read over my short story. I liked it, but I hoped that we wouldn't have to read these out loud. One, Alice would put two and two together before I even finished the first page. Two, other people might too.

Hmmm… what to write next?

_The girl had gifts for the boy. They were all pretty and unique in their own way. One was a necklace, another was a bracelet, and the third was a pair of earrings. He got them for her for two occasions. The bracelet for the girl's birthday and the necklace for Christmas, right before she ended things. The earrings were just a gift. He told her that a diamond never fades, just like his love for her. He also said necklaces and bracelets go in and out of style, but earrings never grow old._

_The day the girl saw the boy and her enemy together she ran home. She tore the necklace off her neck and put it in a box. She then found the earrings and her bracelet and put them in that box too. Once they were in there, she wasn't sure what to do with them._

_She could burn them. Make a nice fire out of the box and the metal inside of it. She could just throw it away. Maybe she would mail somewhere, anywhere. She decided to mail it to her mom. She attached a note to it reading that her mother shouldn't wear them, but find a way to get rid of them. The girl didn't care what she did, just as long as it was out of her sight and hopefully out of her mind._

_When she was ready to mail them, however, she couldn't do it. She could bring herself to get rid of these beautiful gifts the boy had given to her. So the girl came up with another option. She would get a cardboard box and label it the boy's name. She would take everything that was his, or reminded her of him and put it in that box. Then she would put it in her closet in a place where she wouldn't be able to find it unless she cleared out the whole thing._

_She smiled to herself whenever she finished the plan. She put everything away safely in the box and put it high in her closet. She hasn't looked at the box since._

"What are you writing?" Edward asked slowly and softly. It sounded like it pained him to talk to her at all.

_Then don't talk to me_, I thought. I looked up at him. Alice was right. His eyes did look longing, and whenever he saw my eyes they changed to sadness. I couldn't bear it, so I looked down at my paper. "It's an assignment for Mr. Long's class. We have to write a short story that teens can relate to."

"What are you writing about?"

I sighed. I couldn't tell him what I was writing about. I could barely write it myself without wanting to curl up into a ball and cry. If I told him, I would have to look at him, which would just make me break. "You know fashions, boys, and dancing. The usual."

He laughed half-heartedly. "Oh yes because I know how into that stuff you are. You're sounding like Alice or Jess-"he said, but stopped.

I stopped breathing. Did he seriously bring her into this conversation? Wow, I can't believe it. I looked away. I started to gather my stuff. I could go and talk to Mike for the rest of class, just as long as I didn't have to sit here.

"Bella, wait. I'm sorry I didn't mean to bring her into this. It was just a slip of the tongue. I didn't mean it at all," he said quickly and quietly.

"Edward, just stop," I snapped. "We're done here."

I then picked up my stuff and walked over to Mike's table. Luckily his partner wasn't here today, so I wouldn't have to stand and look awkward. I think we got into a conversation about Mike asking someone to the dance, but I wasn't listening. I was still shocked that he would even think about bringing _her_ into our conversation.

School was finally over. Meaning I could go home and finish writing my story, or get most of it done. I would have to face Chris sometime today though. That was if I really was planning on breaking up with him. How would I do it?

"Hey babe. I haven't seen you at all today. Are you okay?" Chris asked coming up behind me.

_Crap I forgot to keep walking as I was thinking._ "Hey, um I might be. Chris, we need to talk."

He looked confused at first, but he nodded and said he would go home and drop off his stuff and then come over to my house so we could talk. After he left to walk towards his car I spun around and groaned. How do you tell someone that you want to break up with them after, what, two years?

"Bella, wait," a voice came from behind me again.

I stayed where I was not wanting to look who was coming up behind me to talk to me about something I really didn't want to hear.

Emmett, someone I wasn't expecting, walked around me and started talking, "I haven't seen you in awhile. What's been going on?"

"Nothing really. I've just been sort of busy lately. Starting to get ready for mid terms. You know."

He nodded, not believing me. How could everyone tell I was lying? "Bella, what's really going on?"

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "Why do you care, Emmett?"

He laughed putting his arm around my shoulder, guiding me to my truck. "Because, you're like my little sister, you know? And normally when something is bothering my little sister I like to know what it is. So are you going to tell me, or do I have to play 20 questions?"

I laughed. He was like a big brother to me. I loved him for that. "I think you'll have to play 20 questions because I really don't want to get into it. With anyone."

He sighed, frustrated. "Come on Bells, I wanna know!"

"You sound like you're three. So maybe you're my little brother, or something."

"Don't change the subject. Just tell me, please."

"Look, Emmett, I can't get into it right now. I have to meet someone at my house soon and I don't think they would like it if I was late because I was talking to you, no offense."

He dropped his arm off my shoulders and opened up my truck door for me. I got in and smiled at him. "Thank you, and I prom- I will tell you sometime in the future."

"Meaning, not until it is resolved or something?"

I thought about it for a second. "Something like that." Then he shut the door and I drove off to my house. Now I just had to figure out what I was going to say to Chris. I've never done this before. I don't know how it goes.

Oh wait, that's not true. I just did this. I did it with Edward. I ended things with him, but that wasn't really my choice, well, it sort of was but I had too. This was my choice through and through. Maybe I should do it like I did when I 'broke up' with Edward. That may work.

He was already here! What the heck? Didn't it take at least a half an hour to go home and finish some things before coming over to my house? Ugh, I don't want to do this, but I have too.

I walked up slowly to the door. He was sitting on the step and looking down at his shoes. "Where were you?"

"Sorry, I was talking to Emmett Cullen about something," I said sitting down next to him.

He looked over to me. He was worried, I could tell. He must know what's coming. Why doesn't he just break up with me? It would my life ten times easier. "Chris we really need to talk," I whispered.

"About what?"

"About us, Chris. It's not working out for me like I thought it would be by this time. I thought I would be able to tell you I loved you months before you told me instead of the other way around. I thought I would be happier then I am. I thought I would feel so comfortable with you that I wouldn't even notice other people, but I'm not any of that.

"I'm not happier, I'm actually sadder. I can't say I love you because I'm not in love with you. I love you and all, but I'm not _in_ love with you. Also, I'm not comfortable with you. Whenever you put your arm around me, I feel like I belong somewhere else."

I paused still looking at the ground. Did it suddenly get hotter out here? "Chris, I really am sorry, but I can't do it anymore. I hope we can still be friends." Not like it's ever going to happen. Once you break up with someone it's sort of hard to stay friends afterwards **(A/N: I know from experience)**.

Chris seemed so shocked. Like he didn't know what to say. He clearly didn't see this coming at all. He thought I was talking about something totally different when I said 'we need to talk', which normally means it's the end of us. Well at least in my book it does.

"Wow, that was… unexpected. Did I do something wrong?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No, no Chris. This is totally me. This has nothing to do with you."

"What happened then? I thought we were doing great there."

I sighed. "I'm not quite sure, to be honest. Two years is a long time for someone who is only a junior in high school. Maybe if we met in college, or something, things would be different. I'm just not ready for this."

He nodded, still running over things in his mind. "It was Edward wasn't it? You two seemed to have some kind of bond, but I just didn't know what. I never said anything because I didn't want to upset you, but I have to know now. Do you have something with Edward going on?"

I thought about it for a second. I didn't even realize that he noticed those kinds of things. He just always seemed oblivious to a lot of things. "No, I don't." Not a complete lie. I mean I did, but now I don't…

He nodded again. "Okay, well I would like if we could still be friends. I care a lot about you, Bella. I don't want to lose you all together."

I smiled at him. It was nice that he could take the high road in something like this. "Thank you, Chris. That means a lot to me." I got up and he did too. Then I hugged him and said goodbye. I walked inside proud of myself.

That went a lot smoother than I thought it would. Now I just have to see what tomorrow will be like. How will people react? Ah, who cares? I just want to finish my story.

_When the girl finally got up the courage she broke up with her boyfriend of two years. When she was telling him she let things slip out, like she was never comfortable with him and she never truly loved him like she loved the boy who got away. She never realized how easy it was to say goodbye to someone you weren't in love with._

_When they said their last goodbyes, the girl went into her house and lay down on her bed. She didn't believe that she was balling like she did when she ended things with the boy. How could that be? She and the boy were never officially together. So, why did she care about him that much?_

_It was then that the girl realized she was in love with the boy._

* * *

A/N: I hoped you enjoyed Bella's short story. Tell me if you liked that idea. Yes, I updated pretty fast and I'll try to continue doing that, but I don't know how long that will last. Anyways I'll try to get the next chapter up by the weekend.


	7. Never Too Late

A/N: What can I say? I just got so caught up in the story my mind just kept on giving me ideas.

June 29, 2008

I don't own Twilight.

* * *

My pen slipped out of my fingers. I stared at the words I just wrote. Wait, did I seriously just write that? I mean I just broke up with my boyfriend 15 minutes ago! Were the words even true?

I kept staring at the paper rereading everything that I have written today. It was basically my life this past year spread out on paper. Why was I writing this again?

I looked down at the last line I wrote: _It was then that the girl realized she was in love with the boy._ Wow I really hit the nail on the head with this one. I mean as soon as I wrote it, I realized it. I finally realized the truth I guess you could say.

I put the paper in my backpack. I really didn't want to look at it right now. So, instead I went downstairs and started to make dinner for Charlie. Maybe I'll make a really good meal so that I could ease into telling him that Chris and I are no longer a couple. Maybe I'll make steak and potatoes. Everyone loves that.

"Bella, are you home?" Charlie asked as he came through the front door.

_No, someone else is making dinner for you,_ I wanted to say. "Yeah dad, I'm here."

He nodded as he came into the kitchen. "Bells, can I talk to you about something?"

"Uh, sure?"

"I heard that you and Chris broke up." _Wow, news spreads really fast around here,_ I thought. "What's that all about? I thought you guys were doing great. You two were perfect for each other."

I tried to remain calm so I gripped the steak knife harder. "Dad, I know you liked Chris and all, but I just didn't feel right during these few months. I don't know why, I just didn't and I had to end it then."

Charlie thought about what I just said as he sat down at the dinner table. It seemed like he had some idea all of a sudden because his face changed from thinking to surprise to disappointed. "Does this have anything to do with that boy, Edward?"

I slammed the knife on the counter and looked at him. Everyone was going to react this way. "No, Dad, okay. It has nothing to do with _him_. This was all me. So get over it!" I said as I ran to my room.

Why does everyone think this has something to do with Edward? If they have been paying attention they could see we could barely be in the same room as each other let alone be lab partners. Did Chris still think that and tell people that? Oh no.

That night I couldn't really sleep. I was worried about the next day. I was worried about my paper and what people were going to say. I could already tell that it would be a horrible day.

When I woke up though, my thoughts were proven. I looked out the window and find out that it snowed last night. Some time whenever I actually did fall asleep. Great.

On the way to school I had to concentrate, but I really couldn't. I kept on thinking about that stupid short story in my backpack. What would Mr. Long do with it? Ugh, I didn't even want to know.

I parked where I parked the day I was hiding from everyone. No one came up to me when I did park. I'm not sure if they even noticed. They were all engrossed in something Mike was telling people. Probably the story of me and Chris breaking up. I don't think I can deal with this today.

"Hey Bella, what's up?" Alice asked coming up to me.

I leaned against my truck and turned away from Mike and the rest of my friends. "Alice, I broke up with Chris yesterday."

She stared at me for a long time. I don't think she believed me at first. "What?"

"I broke up with Chris yesterday, like right after school," I said again.

"Wow, I can't believe you actually did it." Her body clasped next to mine on the truck. "If only you did this like a week or so ago."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because Edward and Jessica wouldn't be going out and you and Edward wouldn't be in this weird awkward phase you guys have going on."

I sighed. She was right, of course. I mean if I did this sooner than Edward and I would probably be going on in public or something. We wouldn't be hiding our feelings. I wasn't thinking then. I didn't realize it. "Yeah, I know."

"How long was that 'fling' going on between you two anyways? You know before it all crashed and burned." Alice asked getting off my truck to face me.

"What do you mean?"

"Come on, Bella. If you live with him you could tell. You guys would talk on the phone late at night. Also, the way he looked at you, you could just tell something was going on."

_There is no way around this one_, I thought to myself. "It sort of started in September."

Alice's eyes went huge. She must not have thought it was going on that long. "You're kidding?" I shook my head. "I thought it was only going on since November."

"How did you figure it out?" I asked. I was curious.

She shook her head. "I don't know. I mean one night I heard him talking on the phone outside, and I got curious to see who it was. So I picked up the phone and heard your voice on the other line. I didn't think much of it at first, but the next night he was talking to you again, so I thought maybe you had another project or something so I listened in," she said sheepishly, "and I could tell it was more deep then most people would talk to each other. So, then I watched you two closely the next time you came over and I could just tell."

I laughed softly. I didn't think anyone would be able to figure out, but apparently I was wrong. "Hmm, interesting."

"You're not mad are you? I mean Edward was at first, but then he didn't care, but you don't care do you?"

Edward knew that she knew? "Wait, how long did Edward know that you knew?"

"Not long, don't worry. It was actually after you ending things. I told him I knew and he told me about the 'break up' thing. What's up with that anyways?"

I looked over to Jessica and Edward. His arm was around her waist, but he still seemed distant. Not that I cared or anything. "Jessica," I whispered, "saw us somehow and told me that if I continued to see him on the side that she would tell the whole school about us. I shouldn't have cared what other people thought about me, but I did. So, I told her I would end things."

"Wait, why would she even care if you saw him 'on the side'?"

"Because she had a thing for him, and she didn't want me in the picture, or something."

"Wow, what a bitch."

I nodded. "Let's get to class. We're going to be late," I said looking away from Edward and his girlfriend.

"Okay class, please pass up you're essays. The top three will be read to the class by me. I'll tell you if yours will get presented by the end of class," Mr. Long said as I passed my essay to Alice.

"So what did you write about?" Alice asked me.

"Did you write about your break up with Chris?" Mike asked me bitterly.

I rolled my eyes. Actually I did, but he doesn't need to know that. Besides it's not like he'll ever read it. "No, I didn't Mike. Why would you care?"

"Because he's my best friend, and you just crushed him last night. I bet it has something to do with Edward."

I groaned. "That's it!" I yelled as I stood up. "Everyone, I did _not_ break up with Chris because of Edward! I don't know why, but I just broke up with him. Get over it! It's none of your business!"

Alice laughed at me as I sat back down. "Are you done, Miss Swan?" Mr. Long asked.

I blushed. "Yeah, sorry about that."

Mike just stared at me, along with the rest of the class. Okay maybe that wasn't the best way to do it, but at least I did it. Maybe they will have something else to talk about besides Chris and I's break up.

"You go Bella," Alice said punching me lightly, as we got up to leave. "I don't think people will be talking about anything besides your speech."

I smiled weakly at that. That is a plus.

"Isabella, can I talk to you for a second?" Mr. Long asked me as we passed his desk.

I looked at Alice, who just shrugged and then I nodded. "Yeah, look Mr. Long I'm sorry about my outburst today. I just was getting sick of people thinking that. I had to give a message, sort of."

"Apology accepted, but that's not what I'm going to talk to you about. I want to present your essay to the class. It was something many teens could relate too. Would that be okay with you?"

My heart jumped. _You've gotta be kidding me._ "Um, sure, but could you maybe do it anonymously?"

He looked at me confused but then shrugged. "Sure I guess. If that's what you want."

I nodded and headed out the door. This would happen to me. Walking around the school was weird without having Chris by my side. It felt weird to be… single. Also everyone was staring at me, which was also weird.

The next periods sucked. I really didn't talk to anyone. They were all judging me silently. For lunch I decided to make everyone's life easier and just go to the library again. It was nice because no one was there. No one was judging me or staring at me or talking about me behind my back.

I grabbed a book off the shelves and started reading it in the seat that I sat in yesterday. I looked up when someone stood in front of me waiting for something.

It was Edward. I rolled my eyes and got up and started to walk away from him. That was until he grabbed my arm.

"Bella, wait, I have to talk to you," he whispered.

I jerked back, almost to his arms. Thankfully I caught myself. "I don't care Edward. Shouldn't you get back to your _girlfriend_? She's probably wondering where you are."

He sighed, still holding my arm. "Bella, listen to me for a second. Okay?" I nodded, but looked away from him. "I wanted to know if you were okay."

"Why would you?"

"Because I heard you broke up with Chris. I know it was a hard decision-"

"It wasn't. I broke up with him, end of story. Why do people care so much?" I snapped a little too loud.

"Shush," the librarian said harshly.

Edward looked at me carefully, like he was making sure it was really me who was talking. "Well, Bella, they probably care so much because you guys were going out for two years, and this was just out of the blue." He paused. "Why wasn't it a hard decision now, but it was two weeks ago?"

I turned my head so I could look into his green eyes. They were confused and angry. _Crap_. "I don't know. I thought about it and I realized it just wasn't working out the way it should be," I whispered.

"I know that's not what you're really thinking. Tell me," he whispered back persuasively as he pushed back a piece of hair out of my face.

I sighed. "Because once I realized I no longer had you in my life it just didn't make sense for me to try to be with someone else. I can't _be_ with anyone else, okay?" I said annoyed as I jerked my hand away from his grip and walked towards the door.

At first I was surprised that he didn't come after me because that was normally his thing. Then I realized he didn't need to come after me. I wasn't going to change what I just said, and I wasn't going to stop for him.

I walked straight to my truck and drove away. I couldn't stand this place any longer. I couldn't stand having to go to Biology with Edward there and I couldn't stand having to go to Gym with Mike, so they could all judge me there. I just wanted to get out of this place, for good.

When I got home I turned on my computer and walked downstairs to the answering machine. Two messages blinked on it. I pressed the play button and listened while pouring myself a glass of lemonade.

_Hi everyone, it me Renee. Bella, I was wondering if you were thinking about coming down to see us for Spring Break. I would love to see you. It seems like forever since we have seen each other. Call me back, bye!_

_Beep._

_Bella,_ (Alice's voice said)_ I hope you get this before Charlie comes home, but guess what? I told Edward about you and Chris. You should have seen how surprised he was. I thought he was going to have a heart attack or something. Anyways, I think he's going to break up with Jessica because of this! How great is that? Call me sometime later! Bye!_

I deleted the second message. Why did Alice call me to tell me that? Why didn't she just tell me face to face? Well we do only have one class together and she might have told him afterwards…

I nearly dropped my glass. That's why he came up to me in the library. Because Alice told him I broke up with Chris. He wouldn't have come up to me if Alice waited till the end of the day, or something. I groaned. He probably hates me even more now.

I walked up to my computer so I could write Renee an email. I haven't done this in awhile. It showed because I had three unread email by her from ever week since the last time I wrote her.

Dear Mom,

Calm down. Things have been pretty busy over here. That's why I haven't written back to you in awhile. So things happened, like I broke up with Chris. Yes, I know, you're either shocked or sad because you loved him so much. Charlie was sad and disappointed. I think he thought we were going to get married or something. I actually just broke up with him yesterday.

Anyways, I also just got you message and I want to come down for Spring Break. I have to get out of here! Everyone is judging me because of the break up. It sucks. I can't wait to see you!

Your judged daughter,

Bella

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

The next day at school seemed to be better, but then again I just got here. I noticed not too many people were staring at me when I came to class early. Not many people stared at me strangely when they came into class too.

"Hey," Alice said as she sat down in front of me. "Why didn't you call me back yesterday?"

"Sorry, I had to call Renee yesterday and I just didn't get off in time to call you. Well, I guess I did, but I just wanted sleep. I had to get out of that day."

She nodded. "I understand. Yesterday didn't seem like your best day. Edward said-"

"Edward said something about me? What?" I asked angrily.

"He just said when he ran into you; you seemed angry and more distant."

I laughed. "When he ran into me, more like when he cornered me in the library."

"He what?"

"Class, class, settle down," Mr. Long said coming into the room. "Today I will be reading the short stories your classmates wrote. Well, only three, but you can tell me what you thought of them afterwards." I groaned internally. "Now, I'm not going to say anyone's name, so you can guess and ask them later. Now for the first one."

I listened patiently as he finished the first two, knowing mine would have to be coming up last. My mind however wasn't patient. What are people going to say? Are people going to realize that it's my story? Will people say something?

_There was this girl who had a perfect life. A terrific boyfriend who would always be there for her, some great friends who knew how to make her feel better, a great home to live in, and is a great student. She did have an enemy though. This person was out to make sure that she didn't have everything that she wanted._

My heart jumped. That was my story alright. I looked around at my classmates as he continued the story. They all seem engrossed by it. Like they actually liked it. It seemed like some of them actually understood what the story was talking about. They seemed to be able to relate to it.

_It was then that the girl realized she was in love with the boy._

There, he was done. Now people can put two and two together and judge me…

"So, class, what did you think?"

"I think the girl realized that earlier, but she just didn't want to face the facts that she didn't love her boyfriend. It seemed like she was cared too much about what other people thought. Also I don't think she should have cared about what the enemy said. She should have kept the boy with her," Allison Davis said.

"I think that she cared too much for her boyfriend. She didn't want to leave him because she knew him too well. He was sort of her comfort because she always knew him. She was afraid to try something new," Hannah White said.

"Well, I think the girl thought it would be easier then it was to let go of the boy. She didn't think that it would matter that much to her if she just let him go. She thought she was always in love with her boyfriend. That was until she realized how much it hurt to see the boy with her enemy. Then she realized she didn't care about her boyfriend as much as she thought she did," Alice said.

The bell rang then.

"Good job class. See you tomorrow," Mr. Long said.

I quickly walked out of the class only to have Alice catch up with me. "So, Bella, what did you think about that last story?" She knew.

"Um, I'm not sure. I guess it was okay, but it was a little cheesy."

She got in front of me and stopped me almost right in front of Edward and Jessica. "You wrote it didn't you? I mean no one could have gotten how sad that girl was besides you."

I looked over to Edward and Jessica, who were both staring at us. "Um, yea I did. I wrote and I still wish Mr. Long didn't have to share it with our class, but he did. Lucky me."

Alice laughed putting her arm around me leaving _them_ behind. "Ah Bella, I knew that would happen."

I laughed too. "You did?"

"Yes. That stuff normally comes out when you least expect it too. I knew it had to be on paper."

I nodded, still not understanding.

Ugh, I hate Bio. This day more than others because Edward probably heard everything Alice and I were talking about making it worse than normal. He probably knows by now what the story was about. Alice probably told him.

"Class, meet me outside in the greenhouse," Mr. Banner said leaving the room.

We all followed him outside to the greenhouse. After he told us what we had to do for the class today he let us go off with our lab partners and finish the assignment.

"It's cold out today," Edward said as we rounded a corner.

_Well, duh, it's winter._ "Yeah it is."

I looked up at him to see him looking around to see if anyone was near. I shook my head and started to turn around until he grabbed my arm and pulled me into a corner of the greenhouse. "What did your story really have to do with?"

I sighed. "Please, you know what it had to do with," I whispered harshly.

"No I don't. Alice wouldn't tell me no matter how many times I asked her."

"Well you're not going to find out from me, so you'll have to survive."

"Bella, please just tell me. Did it have something to do with me?"

I shrugged. "I wouldn't know. I blocked it out of my mind as soon as I wrote it."

"No you didn't it, just tell me. It's killing me not knowing."

I turned around and started walking around the greenhouse. _He _followed. "Edward, just ask Mr. Long if you want to know that badly. I'm not going to tell you so get over it. Now let's just do this assignment and get out of here."

After school I walked to my truck by myself. I didn't think anyone would need me at the moment. That was until someone was leaning on my car door, waiting for me.

"I read it," he said quietly getting up to look at me.

"That's nice," I said trying to ignore him so I could go home.

"Did it mean something to you or did you just write it?"

I stopped midway to opening my door and looked at him. "I don't know."

He grabbed my arms. "Yes, Bella, you do know why. Just tell me."

I looked up at him. His face was soft, but confused. "I wrote it the day I broke up with Chris. Pretty much everything I was feeling that day or did that day is in that story."

His hands slid down my arms and to my hands. He took my hands in his and sighed. "I feel the same way. I love you, Bella, I really do. I missed you so much."

I smiled at him, but didn't do anything else. I couldn't. He still had a girlfriend and I just broke up with my boyfriend. "Edward, I can't do what I did before. I'm sorry, but I cannot do the cheating thing again."

He nodded smiling at me. "I know, I don't want to do it either. I'm going to break up with Jessica, I mean it. I can't stand being apart anymore." He looked around the parking lot to make sure no one was watching and kissed me softly on the lips. "I love you."

I sighed and looked up into his green eyes again. "I love you too."

* * *

A/N: Yay! They are back together, maybe. He-he. You'll see in my next chapter, but I hoped you liked this one. Tell me what you thought!


	8. Now the Truth Comes Out

A/N: I know it's taken me forever to update, but I was starting a new story. I had to get it going before I could update any other story. You guys should read it, though. It called _The Impossible Miracle_. The title sort of speaks for itself. Anyways, thanks for being so patient!

July 12, 2008

I don't own anything…

* * *

The day next day I was walking towards the English building and try to remember if we had a test today or not. Suddenly someone tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned to look no one was there. So I turned back and Edward was in front of me. "Ha-ha, very funny."

"I thought it was," he said smiling. He quickly grabbed my arm and pulled me into the side of the building. "I think I'm doing it today."

"Doing what exactly?" I asked looking around to make sure no one saw us.

"I'm going to break up with Jessica today. I need to be able to be with you in public for once," he said kissing me on the lips.

When I pulled away, unwillingly, I smiled. "I'm glad. Now, do you remember if we have an English test today or not?"

"Yep, we do," Alice said appearing beside us. I quickly pushed away from Edward trying to look like nothing happened, even though I couldn't stop smiling. "Oh please, I know you guys have been hooking up behind everyone's back. You don't need to hide anything from me."

"Please tell me you didn't tell Jasper," Edward asked with pleading eyes. "Wait you told our whole family didn't you?" Alice said nothing, but smiled. "Ugh, so that's why they were all so mad at me for going out with Jessica."

"Pretty much, now come on Bella, we have to go take a test. Bye Edward," she said grabbing my arm and pulling me away from him. I smiled at him then turned around to walk to class with Alice.

At lunch I sat next to Alice at the Cullens table. It wasn't that awkward considering everyone knew me and for the most part liked me. Edward, however, wasn't even at lunch. "Alice, what happened to Edward?" I whispered to her.

She looked over to Emmett and shrugged. "He is going to break up with Jessica now," Emmett whispered across the table. "And we all know why," he teased.

I rolled my eyes. "I didn't tell him to break up with her."

"We all knew he would though, once he had you back. He was only using her to get you jealous," Jasper said.

Alice elbowed him. "She wasn't supposed to know that!" She turned around to look at me. "Bella, you shouldn't be surprised, should you? I mean you could tell he didn't like her at all and he only wanted to get together with you, right?"

I shook my head. "I had no idea. I wasn't really paying attention to how they acted around each other, I only cared that he was going out with her. Wow, I feel so relieved that he didn't actually like her like I thought he did."

Emmet scoffed. "Good thing you didn't notice how they were around each other."

Alice glared at him. "What do you mean?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes at Alice and turned to me. "Well, she was always all over him. He was just trying to get away. Most of the times he would just escape to the library, telling her he had work to do," he whispered.

Alice cut him off then. "That's why I was a little surprised when he told me he ran into at the library, alone. Anyways, we shouldn't talk about it anymore. We'll just see what happens if or when they come into the lunch room."

Then Jessica burst into the cafeteria and headed straight to the table I was at. "Isabella, I'm going to make your life a living hell. I know he broke up with me because of you. You will regret the day you ever made that deal with me."

_Oh no, not the deal._ When she stormed off, with everyone looking at her, the Cullens and Hales all turned to me with confused eyes. I sunk down low hoping I could just disappear. I knew they were going to ask me, but how could I get out of it? "Um, I should go find Edward," I said getting up and walking out the doors.

I found him in the library in a total walled in corner. "Hey."

He looked up. "Hey," he said softly walking over to me and hugging me. "I broke up with her."

"I know," I said burring my face into his chest. "The whole school knows. She came up to me in the cafeteria and told me I would regret the day I made the deal with her."

"What deal?" he asked pulling me away to look into my face.

I couldn't even look into his eyes. I felt so bad that I ever made this deal. "The day I broke it off with you was the day Jessica cornered me and told me to break it off with you or else she would tell the whole school that we have been sneaking around everyone's back."

"When did she even see us?"

"The night before my Christmas Eve party. The night you walked me home from your house and we got into that argument," I said sheepishly.

"So, since you were afraid she would tell the whole school about us, you broke us up and didn't even tell me about the threat?" he asked angrily and confused.

I nodded. "But I didn't want break up with you! I was just worrying about Chris and how embarrassed he would be if that went around the whole school like that. I didn't want him to go through that. I didn't care about my reputation after we stopped seeing each other."

"You should have told me about it though. I would have made sure it didn't get around the school. I would have done anything for you, didn't you know that?" He paused. "Besides the whole school is going to find out anyways. Jessica will tell them."

"Edward I know I should have told you and I'm sorry I didn't. I was just so confused and worried that she would let it slip. I just did it without even thinking about it."

"So she was the enemy in your story? The girl who threatened the author?" he asked. His face was calculating something. I nodded, not sure what to expect. "So that's why you ended things with me on Christmas Eve?"

"Yes, but you should know that I have regretted it every single day since because I knew I shouldn't have done that if I really liked you, which I did, but I was just so afraid that this would just go around it and it would kill Chris and people would hate you even-"I started saying before he cut me off by kissing me.

"Yes," he said panting, "you should have told me, but I'm glad you told me now. I thought you broke it off with me because you no longer liked me, or you didn't think our thing was worth losing everything you had, even though you did lose everything for us. Bella, its okay. I still love you," he said cupping my face. "I love you."

I smile weakly at him. He did know just how to calm me down in most ways Chris didn't know. That's why I picked him. "I love you too, Edward. And I'm so sorry I didn't tell you, I know I should have. I won't do it again."

"I'm sure you will," he said chuckling, "but as long as you tell me at some point, I will still love you." He kissed my forehead and then took my hand. "Come on, we should get to class before we are late."

After school I was heading to my car thinking about what I had to do tonight. Let's see, I was going to go home and finish my homework and then Alice, Jasper, Edward and I are going to a movie and then back to her house to hang out, maybe make out…

"Chris," I breathed. "What are you doing?"

He looked at me and got off my truck and walked up to me. "Is it true?"

"Is what true?"

"What Jessica told me about you and that Cullen kid?"

My eyes went wide. Why did she have to tell him today? Why not tomorrow or something? "Chris, I don't know-"

"You don't know what, Bella? You don't know how to explain it? It's pretty easy if you don't. Just tell me if you hooked up with him while going out with me," he said raising his voice.

I looked around the parking lot. Lots of people were staring, great. "Chris, can we go somewhere else to talk about this? I think I could explain everything better somewhere else."

He shook his head. "No Bella. Explain it here, right now."

I sighed. This will be difficult. "Chris, it's complicated."

"How is it complicated? Did you guys just do stuff, or did you kiss and make out a lot?"

I nodded. "We sort of started hooking up the second day of school, when you got into a fight with him and we got into a fight. When I stormed out of my house that day I drove to his house and it just sort of happened. I broke it off with him in December because Jessica threatened to tell the whole school, and that's when she started going out with Edward."

He looked at me shocked. Like he thought I wasn't going to tell him the truth and I was just going to lie about it and say nothing happened and Jessica's just trying to get me into a trouble. I didn't, however, I basically told him the truth. "See, that wasn't that complicated," he said turning and leaving me standing there with people staring at me.

I sighed and hurried to my truck. My safe truck. At least I could go home now.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I was lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I can't believe I had to tell Chris that in front of the whole school, minus the Cullens. Charlie will find out, and flip at me. He'll probably go and call Renee while he's at it and then she'll hate me too. Life sucks right about now.

Why did she have to tell him? Couldn't she just keep it to herself and realize Edward didn't like her at all? Did she really need to get back at me for 'stealing' her boyfriend, or did she really just hate other people happier than her? Was even my friend at all, or was she just using me?

Angela and Ben will hate me too, no doubt. Angela always thought I would tell her everything, but I never told her anything about Edward. I never even mentioned I talked to him at all. She and Ben will join Chris, Mike, Jessica and Lauren and I won't have any of my friends. Sure I'll have the Cullens, but I'll miss some of my old friends. They did survive most of high school with me.

I groaned and got up to look out the window. It's going to rain again. Could this day get any worse? Yep, Chris could show up, like he was… What?

I ran downstairs and opened the door. "Chris, what are you doing here?"

"I have to ask you something," he yelled getting out of his car.

I sighed. Is he just going to yell at me or something? "What do you want?" I asked him as he walked up to me.

"Don't give me attitude. I just want to ask you something I think I have a right to know," he said stopping right in front of my porch.

I nodded. He probably did have a right to know anything he wanted since I did this to him. "What do you want to know then?"

He looked down at the ground and then looked at me. "Are you in love with him?"

That was not what I was expecting. I thought he was going to ask me if I slept with him, which was a no. "What?"

"Do you love him, Bella? Is that why you broke up with me for him? Because you love him?"

"Yes, Chris. I do love him. I'm sorry, but I was never in love with you. I love you so much though. You were there with me when I needed you to get through my freshman year here, but I'm not _in_ love with you. I thought I would be, but then Edward came and… it just didn't work out for us," I said waving in between us.

He nodded. "I understand. I mean after Christmas Eve, you seemed different. You seemed like you were missing a piece of yourself. Bella, I don't hate you."

I looked up at him "You don't?"

He shook his head. "I could never hate you. You were my best friend. Best friends don't turn on each other that quickly. Things may be awkward for us for awhile, but I will always be there for you. I'm not going to be like Jessica and hate you for something like this. You found your soul mate, Bella. I am happy you did. I wish it was with me, but I understand. I'm okay."

I couldn't help but smile at him. He's a great guy really. I walked up to him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Chris. I really needed to hear you say that. I'll miss you."

He chuckled. "Why? I'm not going anywhere. You can't get rid of me that easily."

I laughed with him. "Thank you so much."

He nodded and soon he left leaving me on the porch as the rain started to fall. I wish I loved him. He is so great to me. He didn't deserve anything that was happening to him, but I fell in love with someone else. Someone just as great and would probably be as understanding as he is.

Like Chris said, I found my soul mate. I'm not letting go.

* * *

A/N: I know, I know it was a really, really short chapter, but I had to get in a quicky before I leave for a week, again. Sorry, but I will update as soon as I get back! And I'll make that one extra long!

Preview for next chapter (one and only time I just feel bad with how short it is): Edward takes Bella on their first date! And someone shows who they really are to Bella and Edward by doing the unthinkable. ((now I just have to find out what that is… any thoughts? PS. It's something embarrassing/cruel…))


	9. Slow Down

A/N: Sorry guys!! I didn't realize how long it was since I last updated this story. Well, how did you guys like Breaking Dawn? I thought it was good at first, but then I started to read what other people thought and I got to thinking. It wasn't as great as it was made up to be. But I won't say more for those who haven't read it still. So on with the chapter!

August 11, 2008 (Wow summers going fast!)

I don't own anything.

* * *

_Tic. Tak. Tic. Tak_.

I rolled over in my bed. Who was throwing rocks at my window? It's three in the morning. That should be against the law. I groaned as I sat up in my bed. I could barely see anything in my room it was so dark. I really didn't want to risk falling over anything.

_Tic. Tic._

_Fine, fine I'll get up,_ I thought to myself as I pulled myself off my bed and over to the window, tripping in the process. I opened it up and peered outside. Edward was standing in my lawn with rocks in his hand getting ready to throw the next one. "What are you doing?" I asked in a loud whisper.

He smiled at me. "Trying to get your attention. You know you are a very hard person to wake up," he teased.

I turned my head hoping he wouldn't see me blush. "Well, why are you trying to get my attention at three in the morning on a weekday. You know normal people are trying to sleep."

I heard him chuckle. "Yes, well, I'm not normal. I couldn't sleep. So, I wanted to know if you wanted to go for a walk, or something."

I raised an eyebrow. "You want to go for a walk at three in the morning?"

He shrugged. "Why not? Come on, it won't be that bad."

I sighed. "I'll be right down." I went to my closet and got out a pair of shoes. Great I could barely walk without tripping in the light. I'm going to need a body cast after this.

When I got outside, Edward was standing there waiting for me with a smile on his face. I smiled back at him as he took my hand in his. We started walking around the streets, not talking. I never realized how peaceful it was a night. I never thought I would enjoy being in the dark like this.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asked whispered to me as we turned a corner on another street.

I looked at him. He was staring down at me with a smile on his face that made me catch my breath. The smiled looked like he adored every minute with me, and his eyes were warm and caring. "I'm just thinking about how peaceful it is right now. I never thought I would enjoy walking in the dark this much."

He chuckled and pulled me closer to him so he could put his arm around my waist. "See it's not so bad out here. Are you happy?"

"Yes, I am. More than anyone in the world right now. I don't think anyone could be as happy as I am," I said putting my head on his shoulder briefly.

"I can think of one person," he said kissing the top of my head.

I smiled as we continued to walk. When we got back to my house, he pulled me down to the ground with him and put my head on his lap as he looked up into the night sky. I looked up with him, but at some point I fell asleep.

"Bella, love, wake up," a soft voice said in my ear, softly shaking me awake.

I opened my eyes to the darkness of the outside. Once I realized where I was I shot up and looked around. Edward was still sitting on the ground looking at me. "What happen last night? What time is it?"

"Well," Edward said pushing a piece of hair out of my eyes, "we took a walk and when we got back here we sat down and were looking up at the stars. Then I guess we fell asleep, and then here we are. The time is 5:45."

I groaned and stood up. Edward, quick to his feet, helped me up. "I guess I'll see you in a few hours," I said sleepily.

He chuckled and kissed me softly on the lips. "I'll pick you up for school."

I smiled and nodded. Then I walked into the house and up to my room. As soon as I hit my pillow, I was out again. When I woke up this time, it was light. I could feel the heat of the sun. It felt really good compared to the coldness of the rain.

_Knock. Knock._

I walked up to the door to see a smiling Edward standing there. I smiled back at him as he bent down to kiss me on the lips. Unfortunately he pulled away too quickly for me. He laughed when he saw my disappointed face. Then he grabbed my bag out of my hand and put his arm around my waist as we walked to his Volvo.

He opened the door for me and then walked over to his side. "So," he said once he turned on the car and started driving to school, "I was wondering if you were doing anything tonight."

I turned my attention from the window to him. "Well, I was thinking about watching the baseball game with Charlie tonight, and then I was going to go for a run. Why?"

He rolled his eyes at my sarcasm. "I wanted to know if you wanted to go out tonight. You know, for our first date."

I blushed. "Yea, I would love to."

At school everyone eyed us as we walked to Alice's car. What happened? I mean we weren't even holding hands or touching for that matter! We didn't want many people to know yet, but they probably did because of Chris yelling at me.

"Why hello, love birds," Emmett sung in a whisper as we walked up to them.

Edward rolled his eyes at him. "Will you shut up?"

"That's impossible," Rosalie said.

"Quite, especially when I can do this all the time and still see Bella blush," Emmett said laughing.

"Emmett, stop. No one really knows about us yet," Edward said.

"Well, unless you count all the people who heard Chris yelling at Bella yesterday about you two," Jasper said leaning against Alice's car.

Edward whipped around and looked at me, who was looking at the ground. "He yelled at you yesterday? When?"

I sighed and glared at Jasper, who gave me an apologetic look. "After school yesterday…"

"I'll kill him if he does it again."

"Edward, let me talk!" I said raising my voice. "He wanted to know what happened between us because Jessica told him about us sneaking around. But before you get all defensive, you should know he came over later and apologized. He was really nice about it."

Edward took a deep breath. "Okay, fine I won't do anything. He still had no right to yell at you in front of everyone."

"He sort did. I mean I was the one who hurt him, and I probably should have told him so he wouldn't have been taken by surprise."

"Maybe you're right. Just tell me next time he does something like that."

"I promise I will."

The rest of the morning was very strange. Everyone was giving me a dirty look. I mean they were earlier because I broke up with Chris, but the way they were looking at me now made me feel like I did something wrong, or was doing something wrong. Also no one was talking to me besides the Cullens. Even Angela and Ben weren't talking to me.

At lunch I didn't chance anything so I went to the Cullens table and sat with them. "Bella," Alice said when I sat down, "are you okay? You seem uneasy about something. What's happening?"

"No one is looking at me. No one is talking to me," I whispered to her. "It like they all just decided to hate me suddenly. Do you know what's wrong with all of them, or with me?"

Alice sighed. She knew. "It's not what's wrong with you really. It's more like what's wrong with them. They just hate the fact that you are with Edward. I bet a lot of them are mad because they couldn't get Edward if they tried. No Angela and Ben are just taking sides right now. They are sure if they should believe what Chris and Jessica told them or not."

"Wait, what did Chris and Jessica tell them?"

"Well, they told them about you and Edward. They told them that you were sneaking around with him whenever you were going out with Chris. Now I know that part is true, but they also said some other things I know aren't true."

"Like what?" I asked horrified.

"Well…"

"Bella, what's wrong?" Edward asked sitting down next to me.

"Hold on. Alice, go on," I said not turning my attention away from her.

"Jessica said that you guys were doing more then you were," Alice said being very vague. Probably so Edward wouldn't freak out.

I could tell he already got what she was saying. "Jessica was saying this? What gives her the right to say what happened between Bella and me? She doesn't even _know_ what happened with us," he said in an angry whisper.

I put my hand on his arm hoping that would calm him down. He did relax, a little. "I should have known this would happen. Jessica told me this was going to happen. I just thought she was bluffing," I said softly.

"Don't worry; most people aren't really believing her, but some people believe what Chris is saying," Alice said looking down at her food.

"What is Chris saying?" I asked.

Alice glanced up at Edward and then looked at me and shrugged. I looked at Edward and then at Alice who were both looking down at their food now. "Guys, tell me what's going on."

"Nothing love. Don't worry about it. It will all blow over before you know it," Edward said kissing the top of my head.

I rolled my eyes at them both knowing that would never happen. I just let it go, however, because I knew nothing big would happen. At least I hoped…

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I sighed looking at my closet. I had absolutely nothing to wear for my date tonight. What the heck? This one of the only moments in my life where I really could have used Alice's fashion sense. She would have saved me.

I rolled my eyes at myself and pulled out my jeans that had paint on them from the time I had to paint the bathroom. That was a nightmare. Then I looked at the shirts I had laying out. Most of them held some memories I really didn't want to remember tonight. Most of them included ones I had with Chris.

For example, my black baby t-shirt. I wore our second date when he took me to a drive-in movie with Angela and Ben and Jessica and Mike (back when they dated). I laughed so much that night, and not at the movie. But now it was just a sad memory I didn't need right now.

What I'm wearing now will go into the memories I will have with Edward. Meaning I would have to put all the other stuff into a box labeled **CHRIS. **Half of his memories are already away. I just didn't get a chance for the rest. Ugh I'm so screwed up right now.

I then closed my eyes and picked up a dark blue blouse. _That works_, I thought. I put it on and combed my hair, and then went downstairs. Charlie was sitting there watching a baseball game. I almost started to laugh.

"Hey dad, what's up?" I asked sitting down.

"Well Boston's losing," he said with a grunt. Then he looked over to me and did a double take. "Bella, why are dressed like that?"

"Because I'm going out tonight," I said as vaguely as possible. _Please don't ask with who…_

"With who?"

I groaned internally. "With a friend dad. Don't worry I'll be home by ten."

The door bell rang then and I saw Charlie thinking about getting up. I rushed to get my coat and then I went straight out the door and closed it right behind me. "Why are you in such a rush?" Edward asked me confused.

I looked up at him nervously. "I haven't told my dad about us yet and I just don't want to overwhelm him with this. I mean he was just such a big fan of Chris I don't want him to get mad at you and me all in one. So I was just not going to tell him for awhile."

He rolled his eyes and grabbed my hand and pulled me back into my house. "Edward what are you doing?" I whispered at him.

"We are going to tell him we are dating. You have to tell him, love," he whispered back.

I groaned as he ushered me into the living room. "Hey dad."

"Bella, I thought you were going out with…" he stopped short when he saw Edward standing behind me. "What are you doing here?"

"Dad, this is Edward Cullen. Edward this is my dad Charlie Swan," I said awkwardly.

"Nice to meet you Officer Swan," Edward said confidently.

He grunted a reply. "Dad, I was going out with Edward tonight."

"Like as a date?"

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to say no, but that was a lie and Edward would get mad at me, and just tell him anyways. But I just couldn't bring myself to say yes.

"Yes, we were going out on a date," Edward said saving me.

Charlie looked from me to Edward to Edward's hands on my waist. Well, this was going good. "Bella kitchen."

_Great_. I looked at Edward and then went to the kitchen where Charlie already was. "What's the matter dad?"

"Why are you going out with that Cullen boy? Didn't he get in the way of your relationship with Chris? Why would you want to go out with him?" Charlie asked in an angry whisper.

"I'm going out with him because I like him a lot, dad. He was really sweet to me the whole entire time I've known him. And no dad he didn't come in between me and Chris." _Lie, _I thought. "I made the decision to break up with him by myself."

He shrugged. "Okay, well he seems like a gentleman. I'll let you go. Be home by 9:30."

"Dad."

"Fine 10, but no later."

"Okay, bye," I said going back into the living room to get Edward.

We pulled up to beach one in La Push. He stopped and went around to let me out of the car, I blushed when he did. Then he went to the trunk and got out a picnic basket and a blanket for us to sit on. Once he found the perfect spot he put everything down.

"Wow, Edward, this is really nice," I said when he pulled me down onto his lap.

"I thought we needed the perfect first date, and I thought of this place," he said softly in my ear.

I snuggled up against him, due to the breeze. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said.

After we finished eating everything that was in there (mac and cheese, water, and pie), we laid down next to each other and talked about everything. Then suddenly we fell into a comfortable silence watching the stars.

Suddenly I felt Edward's arm go around my waist and pull me up on top of him. "What are you doing?" I asked breathless.

"This," he said pressing his lips to mine.

I locked my arms around his neck as we kissed. I felt his hands go down my side and to my knees. Then he flips up, supporting himself on his hands, so I wouldn't get all of his body weight on me. When we parted, breathlessly, he groaned and flipped onto his side.

"What's wrong?" I asked trying to remember how to breathe.

"I shouldn't have gone that far," he said. Of course he could breathe just fine.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to give you the wrong impression. I don't want us to take this too fast, Bella. I'm all in on this. I don't want anything wrong to happen. I want to make sure everything works out between us," he said. Then he took a deep breath. "I don't think I could lose you like I did."

I turned to my side and lifted my head up on my wrist. "Edward, I don't want to mess this up either, but you shouldn't apologize for it. It was perfect."

"But it went too fast. Just sometimes around you I just can't control myself. I know I took more risks when we weren't together, but I was hoping that would make you break up with _Chris_," he said bitterly. "Now that we are together, I don't want anything to come between us."

"I don't think anything will. We have this connection that I never had with Chris. I felt that the first time we kissed back in September. I don't think anything _can_ come between us."

"I won't let anything," he said putting his arms around my waist again and pulling me closer to him. "I love you too much."

"I feel the same way," I whispered back.

* * *

A/N: I hope you guys liked it! I will try not to go a month without updating again, but school is starting in like two and a half weeks :( ugh not looking forward to it. Oh and that's not all that is to come from Chris and Jessica, by the way... Well review please! Brighten up my day.


	10. Goodbyes Come Too Soon

A/N: Okay I know I never told you guys when I was going to end this story, but I was thinking about it today and I really don't know where else I would go with this story, so this will be the last chapter. Most of my stories and winding down… But don't worry; I'll have a new story up in the near-ish future! I'm excited for it. I know exactly what I'm going to write about. Well enjoy the last chapter of Not Always You and Me

November 3, 2008

I don't own anything

* * *

**One Year Later**

We made it, surprisingly. With everyone against us, we made it. No one thought we would get together after everything that happened to us last year, but it was fate. We were meant to be. We knew it too.

We barely fought and when we did, it was the stupid stuff that he would end up kissing me during the middle of me screaming and that would be the end of it. He always was an amazing kisser.

He came with me to Renee's during the summer and she loved him, like I knew she would. Even Charlie warmed up to him after he saw how he treated me. But here comes the hard part now. We just graduated from Forks High School two months ago, and this is be the summer of our lives before we go off to college. The worst part is they are different ones. I'm going to the University of South Carolina and he's going to the University of North Carolina. (Sorry my favorite colleges, well sort of) Sure we aren't that far away I guess, but it will still be hard being away from each other.

We had one week left together before I boarded the plane and went on my way to sunny South Carolina. I missed the sun. I picked it because I would be pretty close to my mom, and once Edward picked his college I knew it would be the closet one I could get into on such a late notice.

I didn't like the idea of leaving Charlie by himself, or being that far away from Edward. It's not like I didn't trust him, or myself, I just didn't want to spend any time apart. It was too hard. Edward tried to talk me into letting him get out of UNC and go to South Carolina with me, but I knew it was his dream.

"Bella, please, just let me come. I don't want to be away from you and you know it. UNC used to be my dream, but you're my dream now. I just want to be with you not a state away," he used to say to me.

I would always tell him no, but now I wish I didn't. I had to leave in a week for school and he would be here for another week. Ugh life is not fair. Maybe this is what I get for cheating on Chris, maybe this is my punishment.

"Bella, are you coming?" Emmett called from downstairs.

_Crap, I forgot about the camping trip._ I run downstairs to grab my bag and sleeping bag and ran to the car. "Sorry guys I totally forgot about it," I said sitting next to Edward in the back of Alice's car.

"Hey," Edward said next to me. I turned my head and he kissed me on the lips, making me blush.

When we got there, all the couples rented a row boat and took it down to the river so we could row to our camping stop. Edward and I were the last to get on the river, and the slowest. We probably should have gone first…

"We probably should have gone before Emmett and Rose. They will be there an hour before Alice and Jasper, who will get there a half an hour before us probably," I said looking out to the water.

Edward shrugged. "I'm sort of glad we didn't. I like this. We can just talk and relax without everyone around us."

"I guess you're right. This is nice."

We were quite for a little bit while Edward rowed and I watching the ripples in the water get bigger and smaller. Suddenly the ripples stopped coming, but we still moved. I look at Edward still because I noticed the fish below us moving. Then I heard the rushing water and I looked behind Edward to where they were coming from.

"Edward?! What is that?" I yelled over the raging water.

Edward turned around and shrugged calmly. "Didn't anyone tell you there are white water rapids here?"

"No! Why didn't anyone tell me that?" I yelled not actually at him, but just in general.

He shrugged again, complete calm and collective. "I guess they didn't think you would come if you knew. I knew you would have, but maybe just would have ridden a bike or something to our camping spot." I was about to say something else, but Edward yelled over my voice. "Hold on!"

I grabbed the boat like it would be the death of me if we fell. We crashed into the first rapid getting a ton of water in our boat, while Edward turned to try to steer us off of the next rapid. We missed it luckily, but instead we ran into another one sending the boat backwards a little almost making me fall off.

We were almost clear until one came up behind us and tipped us forward into the calm water. When I popped my head up grasping for air, I looked around me not seeing Edward anywhere.

"Edward!" I yelled hoping he would hear me where he was. "Edward!"

A pair of hands grabbed my ankles and pulled me under the water before I had time to scream. Then when I came up again all I heard was laughing. I turned around to see Edward laughing at me.

I splashed me with the water. "I can't believe you did that to me! I was worried!"

"I'm sorry," he said after he calmed down. He them grabbed my waist and pulled me close to him. "I'm really sorry love, but I couldn't resist."

I raise my eyebrow and stared at him. "So was tipping the boat really necessary?"

"Sort of. I didn't think I would get you into the water without tipping it. I could have gone around the rapids, but that was more fun," he said kissing my cheek.

"Wait, you could have gone around the rapids?" he nodded. "I hate you, you know that?"

"No you don't," he whispered in my ear.

I giggled. I could never hate him and he knew that. He kissed my ear and then turned my head with his finger so he could kiss my lips. I twisted in the water so I could put my arms around his neck and kiss him more. He pushed my hips more into his stomach as my hands started running through his hair.

When we finally broke, gasping for air, Edward put his arm around my waist and started swimming over to the boat. When we got there he got in and then helped me in. We almost tipped again, but thankfully we balanced out.

When we got to the camping site, an hour and a half after everyone else, we got out of the boat still a little wet from our adventure. Emmett and Jasper came over to help Edward pull the boat up with the rest of them as I went over to Alice and Rosalie.

"So what happened to you?" Rose asked me.

I blushed and ducked my head a little. "Um, we just got off balance in the boat and ended up tipping."

"You know I never pictured Edward as a skinny dipping kind of guys. Especially in broad daylight," Alice said to Rosalie smiling evilly.

"We did not skinny dip!" I yelled at them. "He took me to the part that has the white water rapids and we ended up tipping into the water at the end of it. We didn't do much else."

"Then what really took you so long to get here?" Rose asked raising her eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes at them. "I don't kiss and tell," I said walking away from them over to the boys. Maybe they were less gossips.

Edward noticed me coming behind him, so he grabbed my waist and pulled me in close to him. I guess Emmett and Jasper got some hint and walked away over to their girls. Edward, instead, took my in the complete opposite direction from where everyone else was heading, but further into the woods.

"Edward, what are you doing? It's going to get dark soon, and you think I trip over a lot of things now? You should see me in the dark in the woods…"

"I did," he said chuckling. "Remember the night I took you home last year. Right before your Christmas party. I took you through the woods to get to your house. I almost had to carry you, you were so slow. I'll just do that now though," he said smiling.

"You never answered my question though. What are you doing? Do you even know where you going?"

He shrugged. "Do I really need too?" I gave him my you-better-know-where-the-hell-you-are-going look. "Fine, fine, I know where I'm going, but it's a surprise so you'll have to be patient with me. Please?"

I sighed. I was never going to win this one. "Fine, but don't take me somewhere close to white water."

He laughed and kept walking the same pace as me, which I knew he hated because he was an amazing fast walker.

When we finally got there, we were still pretty close to the water, but not by much, but there was a tent there. Weren't we staying by anyone else? "Edward, why is there a tent here. I thought we were going to stay close to the rest of them."

Edward left me where I was and went over to the tent to unzip the zipper. "Well, we were going to, but then I thought it would be nice if we had some time to ourselves. I mean we won't have this for much longer. The rest of them agreed. Alice thought it would be nice considering we are the only couple not going to the same college," he said softly.

"Oh."

After that I really didn't know what to say. I wanted so badly for him to come to the same college as me, and he probably could get in if he wanted to, but I didn't want him to give up his dream to be with me. That would hardly be fair.

I needed some time to think about things, I decided, so I walked down to the edge of the water and put my feet in and just sat there for awhile. I needed to think about everything that is going to happen whenever I leave for college, in a week. I don't want to go without Edward, but it looks like I'm going to have to. He'll be in UNC and I'll be in SC, great. That's 183.23 miles away from him. (Yes I looked it up)

I stayed by the water for awhile, just watching the sun go down. Wow it was beautiful.

Suddenly someone sat down behind me and pulled me back into his chest. I snuggled back enjoying every moment of it. "It's beautiful," Edward whispered in my ear.

"Yea, it really is. I wish we could just stay this way forever."

He kissed the top of my head and put his arms around me a little tighter. "I know. This would probably be the best way to spend eternity. If only we had that long together. It would never be boring."

I smiled since that was the exact thing I was thinking of. I didn't want to say goodbye to this moment or any other one. "Yea, if only we had an eternity, life would be so much easier. We wouldn't have to rush to try anything and we would always have each other. There would never be a sad moment."

"Yea and there would never be 183.23 miles between us," he whispered in my ear.

"If only, if only."

Edward then picked me up to help me up with him. Then he jumped into the water with me! What the hell!?

When I came up for air, Edward was already up. "What are you doing? I was just getting dry again!"

Edward started laughing. "Well this would a nice way to spend eternity. Don't you agree?"

"I wouldn't _love_ to spend an eternity wet, if that is what you are asking."

He laughed and pulled me close to him. "Not exactly. I mean wouldn't it be nice like this," he said pulling me against his body.

"Now this isn't too bad."

He raised his eyebrow. "Really, how about now?" he said before his lips were against mine.

I locked my arms around his neck and put my elbows on his shoulders so I could push myself up a little while he kept kissing me. Then he stopped and pulled me down so we could our foreheads on each other's and try to catch our breath.

"Now that is a lot better," I said panting. "I wouldn't mind that for forever."

He laughed. "Bella remember how I told you I didn't want to take anything too fast with you. That I didn't think we should go any further then this?"

I sighed and started backing away from him. "I know, I know. You don't want to do anything like that."

He laughed and grabbed my waist again and pulled me close to him. "You didn't let me finish. I was going to tell you, that I think we can do it. I think we can make it through the four years together. You know why?"

"Why?" I asked not really knowing where he was going with this.

He shook his head smiling. Apparently I was getting something obvious. "Love, I'm going to South Carolina with you."

"No you aren't. UNC is your dream, you should go there."

"Bella, my dream is to be with you. To be anywhere were you are. If you are in South Carolina, then I'm in South Carolina. If you went to Alaska, I would go too. I just want to be with you. Yes, my dream was UNC but that was before I met you. I just want to be with you, love."

I smiled looking down. That's all I ever wanted to hear from him. He really wants to be with me that much to give up his dream and come with me. Wow. "Are you sure? I mean it will only take us a few hours to see each other. I wouldn't be too bad…"

He rolled his eyes. "That's a few hours too long. I'm going to South Carolina, so you'll just have to deal with it," he said kiss me again.

I laughed and kiss him back. I never thought I would be this happy. I'm closer to my mother, with my boyfriend, and I'm finally getting everything I dreamed. I don't think my life could get any better than this.

Edward grabbed my head and pulled me out of the water with him. He then picked me up, bridal style, and carried me to our tent, still kissing me. He laid me down in the tent and gently came on top of me, holding himself up with his arms. Suddenly I became greedy and started to pull his shirt over his head. Surprisingly he helped me do it. Maybe this is what he was talking about. This is something we both wanted. We just needed to be together.

_One Week Later…_

"Bella we have to get going," Edward said coming into my room and grabbing my bag. Then he grabbed my hand and started pulling me out of my room laughed. I laughed with him, but I really wasn't ready to say goodbye.

Surprisingly after our night together last week, nothing changed. If fact they were better. He was maybe a little bit sweeter, but we just worked together better. It was like that happening was the best thing for us. It made us that much stronger, which is kind of weird if you think about it.

We walked downstairs together and Charlie snapped another photo of us. We were the first to leave out of everyone. We had a week of orientation to look forward too, but Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie said they would visit us on their way to college. The weird thing was we were all pretty close to each other college wise.

Alice and Jasper were going to Virginia Tech, which wasn't as close as we would like it, but still pretty close. Emmett and Rosalie were at the University of Miami Florida, which was closer and close to my mom. That was nice.

Everyone was outside waiting for us to come down. Alice ran up to me and hugged me. "I can't believe it's over."

"What's over?" I asked.

"Summer, high school, everything! We're entering college! This is so weird!!" Alice said crying a little in my shirt.

"I'll miss you too Alice."

She finally let go of me and Rosalie came up and hugged me quickly, we still weren't the best of friends but we go closer. Emmett then came up and hugged me tightly. "I'll miss you, Bells. You always kept me entertained. At least we will be closer than we were last year," he said laughing.

"Awe I'll miss you too Emmett. We may come down quite a lot considering you're close to Renee," I said. Great the tears were really coming.

Jasper came up last and hugged me. "Have fun in South Carolina Bella. I'll miss you a lot. You are a great addition to the family."

Wow, that one hit me hard. I'm a great addition to the family. It's amazing they all feel that way about me. Even Carlisle and Esme think that way about me. When they came up and hugged me it felt like I was leaving a huge family behind that I wasn't ready to leave yet.

When Edward and I finally got into the car after a long goodbye from Charlie, I didn't want to leave us much as I thought I might. Edward sense that and said, "It'll be okay Bella. Before you know it we will be coming back for Thanksgiving break and then Christmas break."

I looked over to him and smiled. He was right; this will all be back for me whenever I came back. Just how long it would be was getting to me. Its three months away. "At least I have you," I said quietly.

He smiled my favorite crooked smile and grabbed my hand. This will be the rest of my forever.

* * *

A/N: Awe, it's sad that this is done:(. I just want to thank everyone who reviewed/story alert/author alert or anything with this story. You guys kept it going and I really appreciate everything you guys have said about this story. Thank You So Much!!--I don't know if I could do a sequel of this, it would be in college... maybe if I get enough people wanting it... I don't know.

P.S. please check out my profile for a poll about my next story, Black and White.


	11. Sequel?

**Author's Note:**

Crazy, I know, but I have decided to _attempt_ a sequel to this story. Now I say attempt because I don't know how well it's going to turn out and if anyone will like it. I hope you guys do, though!

It'll take place the summer after their freshman year of college, and I think I have some pretty good ideas for this story. I just sort of came to me, probably because of my sister who just came home from her freshman year of college. Who knows…

Now the story won't be call _Not Always You and Me Part 2_ or anything close to the original title, but if you guys want me to do a sequel then I will post it on this story what the title will be called. The new story probably won't start till my summer which starts on June 12 (yuck) and until I finish my first story _Second Chance_ which is almost done *tear*. So just tell me if you want me to do a sequel and I will start writing. Hopefully I get the first chapter done while I still have it in my head by this weekend, but I won't post it cause I can't have four stories going at once. It's too hard.

Thanks guys!

~AlwaysAndForever13


	12. Title

**Author's Note:**

The sequel is READY! Yay! It's going to be call _Forever and Almost Always_ based off the song by Kate Voegele, well sort of. I just really like the song:P Now I'm going to be finishing Second Chance this week since basketball is finally over, finally. Anyways I want to post it on June 13, because that's technically the first day of summer for me, so be on the look out, or just Author Alert me:) I think you all will enjoy the new story, I loved writing the first chapter, even though it got me thinking about some things, but it should be a good story!

Thanks for staying with me!

~AlwaysAndForever13


End file.
